In a deep dilemma...
(Monday, January 25, 2010/12:10 AM)
I'm dipping into a state of listlessness... No success in getting a part-time job, everybody's studying hard in school and I'm doing practically nothing, migraine treatment in the hospital tentatively put on hold for another 5 more weeks but still gives me a sense of impending doom, and after drafting up travel plans for a few days, my potential travel partner told me that he cannot take leave from his work. Sighhh... =(
You might ask me, why give myself unnecessary stress? I should just go to Japan by the official date scheduled for me. Well, I simply feel that I should take this opportunity to relax and take a breather by my own. Then, on the other hand, I don't know why I'm so afraid to take a bold step to travel independently. Is it the inconveniences which I would encounter as a sole traveler? Or am I lacking confidence in my Japanese and socializing skills? Mehhh... I'm utterly confused... I hope my admission package will come soon, so that I can get a little busier settling my visa and linking my bank account. I have to do something constructive before I can truly feel the excitement of traveling abroad for the first time as a student.
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The famous "Three Sights of Japan". Marvelously beautiful scenic spots where you can spend a little bit more time to absorb and appreciate centuries of tradition and culture. These are places where having friends might actually be a hindrance if you want to take things at your own pace.
I gotta weigh all my options... Emailing every single Japanese friend whom I know. Meeting a few familiar faces every few days within my journey should dispel feelings of loneliness. I'm hoping it'll really become a reality... I hate that "so near yet so far" kinda feeling. (>.<)
posted by MightyFlameboy.
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What are your 'real clothes'?
(Friday, January 15, 2010/11:12 PM)
Thanks to Jon Tan, a few of our CG peeps had the privilege of attending a high profile fashion event at Tangs Plaza! It's my first time attending such events and honestly, it's not really my kind of thing but nevertheless, it was a great experience.
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A nice photo commemoration of our impromptu gathering, courtesy of Tangs photo-taking services! =P
I kinda feel out of place tho', cos' most of the attendees were dressed to the nines, and I dressed quite casually (partly also cos' I didn't have a chance to change into something better since the gathering was decided when I was busy in school). As the gorgeous and hunky models paraded past us, I couldn't help but feel a tinge of envy but I remembered...
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...watching this drama
Entitled "Real Clothes", it touches on the issue on how fashion can change our lives and its importance and relevance in developing our self-esteem and exuding our unique personalities.
In society today, most people belong to 2 categories, nonchalant people who neglects fashion and disregards it, and arrogant people who wants to show off their superiority through fashion. Thankfully, most of my friends aren't like that. =P
Yet, this drama reminds us that although fashion aids us in discovering our self-identity, the core of our hearts is still the utmost important trigger. Through our own personality defined through the years, we develop our own unique fashion sense. Not the other way round! Fashion is merely a tool for you to express your individuality without the need for words.
I find it amazing how J-doramas always depict and emphasize a moral value at the end of it all. The plot may be running thin cos' the typical Japanese drama has only 11 episodes, but the simple messages of morals are almost always enough to impact the viewers.
Much more meaningful than the typical soapy romantic Korean drama which can NEVER happen in real life (I'm guilty of watching Princess Hours and BoF tho' =X), and slapstick cringe-worthy Taiwanese idol dramas which provide nothing but pure brainless entertainment.
No offence to peeps who like those dramas lol. =P I don't mean to generalize but most are like that, agreed? If you're feeling a little angry or guilty, then perhaps you should reflect on how you spend your time on leisure. =D Even leisure can play a part in molding us. Every moment in life is precious, and to quote Kris Allen's song "we gotta live like we're dying". =)
Sooo... back to topic, even if I didn't stand out in the crowd, I should still feel proud of myself cos' I'm pursuing my own unique fashion sense instead of following a trend or fitting myself into a standard mold. Yeah, the other attendees look glamorous and all, but they look the same. Cast envy aside and be your own unique you today! (^-^)
posted by MightyFlameboy.
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The irony of life...
(Monday, January 11, 2010/12:38 AM)
It's almost mid January and I've still not found a job yet! Life is feeling pretty aimless and empty for now. Although I'm looking forward to my SEP in April, I wouldn't want to waste my time for these 3 months... I've sent in internship applications to 4-5 companies. I deposited my resume in a few recruitment agency websites. My mum is assisting me through her contacts. Yet, nothing at all till now... =(
Life can be ironic, huh? My resolution is burning stronger than ever, to make my life on earth meaningful, and yet I'm having so much difficulty finding a job whereas my friends around me seem to get jobs so easily. Same with my health. Everyone is saying exercise is good for me, to stave my illnesses and keep fit, yet exercise is the one biggest thing which will aggravate my migraine and IBS. Sigh... What should I do?
The apparent irony arises from the influence of the devil. Whenever I want to accomplish something great for God, something ALWAYS seem to hinder my path. Should I wait until I'm matured enough to wholly rely on God's voice, but risk losing the window of opportunity? Or should I trust God wholeheartedly despite my circumstances and take a step of faith?
I'm scheduling a career consultation with Kelly Services consultants in NUS on Thursday, so I'm hoping something fruitful will come out of it. In the meantime, I guess I'll just head to school and scout the modules which I'll be taking in future semesters.
2 1/2 more months before the excitement kicks in...
posted by MightyFlameboy.
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It's a brand new year!~
(Tuesday, January 5, 2010/12:22 PM)
Haha, I kena tekan by Val for not blogging over the new year, so here I am! =)
Coming up with new year resolutions is good, but I feel it has become cliched and its meaning has been eroded by the sands of time. Everyone is all fired up and enthusiastic as the clock struck midnight to usher in 2010.
The next day, everyone is furiously scribbling in their notebooks of the things they wish to accomplish this year. Funny thing is most of them fizzle out as they are forced to engage the harsh reality of life after all the X'mas and new year festivities. What's the point then?
Outwardly, I appear slack and unmotivated but pure confidence and convictions need not be proudly displayed. I know strongly what I want in life and I don't need a certain time of the year to reiterate my beliefs. For me, new year resolutions has no meaning because what I'm after, it has become my LIFE's resolution.
No offence to all who did your goals and resolutions though. =P Provided you weren't just latching onto a trend but treat your goals seriously. By hook or by crook, those goals must be achieved. That's the kind of conviction you would need to stay true to what you've planned for yourself for 2010.
Of course, there are some matters which I've neglected, yet I know they're important. Perhaps, I should do a little reflection on those matters which I've neglected. =P
1) Get rid of my nagging migraines
An action plan is already drawn up for me by my neurologist. I may need to check in to hospital for 3 days in 1-2 weeks time for an intensive treatment. Dear E441 brothers and sisters, I'll need your spiritual support in this.
2) Get off my lazy bum and exercise more regularly
Too used to sleeping till 10-11 AM which by then, I'll blame the scorching hot sun and decide not to step out of my house for exercise. Ahhh, gotta change this bad habit. I'll start off gradually by doing some static exercises at home until I feel more conditioned so that I'll be more willing to do further strenuous exercises.
3) Strengthen my spiritual core muscles
I really need to spend more time with God. I need to build up myself spiritually cos' I'll be away from CHC and E441 for 4-5 months and I'll be inevitably subjected to temptations in Japan.
Slightly less than 3 months before my SEP commences... I really can't wait! As for these 3 months, I pray that God provides the opportunity for me to do something productive. Lazing around at home feels good for awhile but not in the long haul. =S
Happy new year and may all your dreams come true this year! (^-^)
posted by MightyFlameboy.
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