F**K THIS S**T
(Monday, March 30, 2009/2:00 AM)
This week was pretty rough... Having to go back to school on a Saturday afternoon really stinks... And when I thought Sunday couldn't get much worse, that's when the saying "the worst has yet to come" hit me right on my forehead.
Well, as some background info, I'm doing a Flash project, showcasing a handphone model, similar to those computer interfaces u see in handphone shops. I'm in charge of the rotation interface. U know? That part where u use the mouse to manipulate the position of the handphone.
My project mates know I suck in Flash but they have such high expectations of me. I've never once thought of slacking, but hey, at least assign me a task that is manageable by my standards?
Originally, I was working on this together with a friend. Then, they pulled her out for her to do another thing. So, I'm supposed to fend for myself. It's ok, I'm fine with that.
What I'm frustrated with is that they continued to assign me other tasks such as graphics, animation, codes not taught in lab sessions, other sub-sections of the project, which exceeds the workload which 2 of us were originally supposed to be in charge of. And if u're forgetting, I'm alone now.
But I guess that's still fine, cos' there are bound to be unexpected changes over the course of the project. What I'm genuinely pissed with is their attitude towards me. They never said it out loud, but they're subtly implying I'm a blardy slacker.
I've got a feeling they think I'm slack for the first half of the project. But what the f*** am I supposed to do if I don't even have the images of the handphone to work with (the handphone used for my project is with the friend who was originally working with me)? And surprisingly, that friend of mine seems to be devoid of blame although she was on my side of the team for that period of time. Maybe she's a girl so she gets special treatment?
Ok, so now I'm alone. I have to code stuff which I've not learnt in labs. Fine with that. But I'm gonna have many questions to ask since I'm a Flash dummy. And when I ask them for help, they would sarcastically go "Walao simple thing also dunno... Give u so many weeks to learn liao..." and grudgingly help me out. Woah, thanks for the encouragement, man!
I know I'm a liability cos' I'm such a noob, and I know that they've done alot for the project, but that doesn't give them any right to snub me and trample on my ego. I mean... I really appreciate their hard work alot... But please kindly show the respect due to me. I know I'm slack compared to them, but no way do I consider myself slack in the absolute sense of the term. I'm always one of the earliest to turn up for project meetings. I may be slow in picking things up, but I swear I have always tried my best.
Can't really blame me if they are overly ambitious in making this project so 'perfect' that they expect me to program something so flawless, despite knowing the limitations of my capabilities? If I had used a simpler method to program my part of the project, my life would be so much relaxed. But since they expect me to use fanciful stuff, at least be more understanding and kindly give me some leeway to learn properly instead of rushing me like a mad cow?
Definitely one of the more major project conflicts since the 1st one during my 1st semester. I promised Kristal that I'm gonna be a lone wolf from Yr 1, Sem 2 onwards, since projects would only destroy friendships. I'd rather do projects with some ah tiongs if it meant that I could avoid conflicts with friends who matter to me. I won't hold anything back to scold them if they're slacking, and I won't care a rat's ass if they scold me.
Held off that plan of being a lone wolf for so long. It may be time to start executing that plan from next semester onwards... And I'm getting rather desperate in grabbing the air tix to Japan for a semester to get away from all these craziness...
posted by MightyFlameboy.
shoot me? | 0 shot me.