~ Flames Of Destiny ~

The faithfulness of God

2010-11-01T01:51:00.002+08:00

God will not allow tribulations which are impossible for us to overcome

God allows tribulations into our lives to make us stronger than before

I have been holding onto the promises of God for the entire semester. On many occasions when the difficulty and the workload of my assignments overwhelmed me, I stared at my laptop screen for what seems like an eternity, succumbing to defeat due to my inadequacies .

The promises of God kept me going despite my weaknesses. When the situation was bleak, I believed in God that things weren't gonna end just like that because I know He has given me a life of destiny.

In my previous post, I was helpless and had to rely on my friend. I made a silent vow to complete the challenge of the next assignment and reciprocate the help which my friend has blessed me with.

The new assignment was even more difficult than the previous one. Pessimism gripped my heart and I almost fell to self-despair again. Yet, after yesterday's service which spoke about "hope comes by trusting in the Lord", I cast away my doubts and renewed my faith in God.

God never disappoints us. He always listens. The wisdom of God brought forth enlightenment and I managed to complete the assignment. And yes, I helped the same friend who helped me the previous time. Besides securing my grades, God has also gave me an opportunity to strengthen an important friendship.

No matter what happens, keep believing in the Lord

The battle is far from over

2010-10-18T01:01:00.006+08:00

My girlfriend's right. I'm such a pessimistic person. I guess it's an inevitable outcome when my eyes opened up to the reality of the world. As the saying goes "ignorance is bliss", and I have chosen the path of uncertainty in my arduous battle toward my dream.

Pessimism has prepared me to expect the worst scenario but also caused me to imagine the worst of humanity. I am blinded by gloom and I couldn't see the goodness of people but merely the fallacies of humanity.

Since I came back to Singapore, nothing has been going right for me, because I had subconsciously compelled myself to focus on the failures of the world around me. Yet, life is beautiful, and it doesn't take much effort to realize that simple fact if we clear our heads.

In the previous 2 blog posts, I lamented my plight of being ousted to the sidelines by my social circles. I was particularly hurt and disappointed by a friend in university because she had a new clique when I was away in Japan and we became tangibly distant.

Just a few years ago, we would have lunch together, take the bus to school together, SMS each other everyday, do school projects and assignments together. Our current relationship is a shadow of its former self.

Assignment submission deadline was looming ahead in less than 2 hours time. I couldn't identify the problems and I lost hope. My friend graciously offered help earlier in the afternoon but he was busy when I needed his advice. The only road left open to me? The friend whom I dearly considered my good buddy in the past.

I was conflicted and struggled within myself for a moment. Would she violently reject my request? Would she mock at me for my inadequacies? I didn't know. I had lost this battle. Giving in to despair, I posted a tweet to 'commemorate' my defeat.

The following sequence of events were beyond my scope of belief. My friend swiftly offered her assistance, sacrificing her time and effort to correct my assignment and even gave explanations to my errors!

Right at that very moment, I realized that she still cares for me although we aren't as close as before anymore. I felt blessed. Yes, God places everyone in my life for a purpose. Whether they are against me or for me, everyone plays a significant role in my journey of life.

Everyone has their own right to live the life they want. I have no business constraining her within the boundaries of our friendship if she feels that there are other friends better than me worth living and caring for.

However, some battles have to be won on my own merits. And this final 1 month before the end of semester will be a test of my endurance, faith and strength.

My friend recommended me this video and it drew my attention because of the funny robotic moves. Before I knew it, I was hooked! Not because it's just another catchy song, but the message behind the MV and the lyrics. It's extremely powerful.

The beginning of the chorus is "Success, depress, ambition. Progress, regress, recognition". With this piece of information, you don't have to know Japanese to absorb the essence of the song. Not gonna post a lengthy explanation, but I'll leave it up to you aspiring philosophers to figure out the mystery!

Current #1 on my playlist!

52 days to go...

Time to let go...

2010-09-14T22:31:00.002+08:00

Once again, I complicated myself in the affairs of others which I have no business dabbling in. What is wrong with me? I don't know... For my pitiful efforts, I was inflicted with the worst migraine of my entire life, to the extent I lost my appetite due to nausea. Why do I love punishing myself? Do I not have enough problems of my own?

Being away for 5 whole months, I came to the conclusion that no one actually gives a damn about me, except for my mum and my closest friends. Even people whom I called "good friends" disappoint me. All these years of dedication and effort in building these friendships, it means nothing to them at all. As the realization crept into my heart, I finally broke down in tears.

After years of anticipated fear, at long last, I am all alone to fight my own battles. I am weaker than I thought. Given my current state, I am fighting a losing battle. I have no more strength to confront my fears. As a stop-gap measure, I shall emotionally shut out myself, be a reclusive hermit who dedicates his all to his studies, and lead his uneventful life quietly by the sidelines, waiting for an opportunity to leave this nation which has burdened his heart with disappointment and frustration.

Benedict, please f**king abide by your own words. And it shall start from this moment on...

Reverse cultural shock

2010-08-31T23:41:00.002+08:00

Ever since Papa Pollack introduced the concept of "reverse cultural shock", fear gripped my heart because I knew it would inevitably happen to me. All was well when I first returned home. The familiar environment. No emotional distress. It seemed as if I never left Singapore and I thought it would be no difficult feat to adapt back to the Singaporean lifestyle.

I was wrong. I was naive to think that everything would return to normal as it was before I left for Japan. My Singaporean life has been halted for 5 months, yet the people around me have moved on to their next phase in life.

I am elated to discover that a good number of my CG friends have matured spiritually after availing themselves for the recent mission trip to Indonesia. Yet, they have moved so far ahead that I find it difficult to catch up with them. Considering that my calling is in Japan, I may never catch up with them at all...

I have come to the realization that it doesn't matter how much time and effort I had invested in the lives of my friends. If I weren't relevant to their lives at any given point in time, I will be left behind. That's how I feel in school now. Friends around me talk about professors whom I don't know, lingo which I couldn't understand. I just can't relate to them anymore...

I've become utterly irrelevant in Singapore. Just another 9 more months to go before my life as a student comes to a closure. Eagerly anticipating my rebirth. But can I really make my way back to Japan? Only the land of my dreams can grant me a second life.

An end to another chapter of my life

2010-07-29T17:02:00.025+08:00

Joy, fun, laughter, tears, sorrows, heartbreaks. As the JTW closing ceremony commenced, emotions ran high as the defining moment of our lives as students in Japan dawned upon us. In a short period of merely 4 months, I have made lifelong friends from all over the world, as well as learned valuable cultural lessons, sometimes the hard way...

Ironically, the moment we had all been waiting for, as well as the moment we dreaded the most (because we have to leave Japan...)

My moment of triumph... :)

Maki-san, my program coordinator who has been taking care of us. I was expecting an old hag at first, but was pleasantly surprised to realize that she's so beautiful! :D

Alamak, I'll see you guys again soon... :P

Sarah, send my regards to your Totoros! :) Momo, I will miss your friendship...

Hey Dan, I think you're the biggest weirdo in JTW (lol). But also, a dear friend with a big heart. :)

Cute German couple, Annika and Philip, who have become my friends for life :D

The Rino Cafe 'gang' is complete with Vanessa! (together with Sarah and Annika) :P

Mengmeng, you've been like a little sister to me. :) Your cheerful attitude has brightened many days of my life here in Japan! :D

Windy, it has been fun studying Japanese together with you! Take care back in Hong Kong and continue loving Kinki Kids! (^-^)

Awesome friends from Hong Kong who help me keep in touch with my Cantonese roots! :)

Rong Yi, I would want to visit you in Shanghai sometime in the future!

Me, Chris and Allen - the fearsome Otaku Trio! (with a guest appearance from Mengmeng)

Big Marc, I'm rather amused when I communicate with you in Mandarin. :P Take care, buddy!

Kieran, you're always seeking to further your knowledge, and that inspires me greatly as a student. :)

Hari, thanks for your encouragement and praise. :) You're an awesome guy too!

Adit (is that right?), you're a nice and gentle guy and thanks for your friendship. :)

Elaine, a bubbly girl who never failed to ease the 'tension' in our solemn Japanese class. :P

Haley, I regret that I never hung out much with you in the last 2 months due to certain circumstances... All the best in your upcoming career :)

I never had such a pretty Korean friend ever in my life! :D And you also have a genuine heart, Christina. Thanks for everything. :)

Hiro, a genuine friend whom I can rely on :)

Yuki, it'll be hard to continue our respective LDRs (long distance relationship) but hang in there!

Takafumi, thanks for your help when I first came to Fukuoka! :D

Kouji, thanks for being such a great friend to me although I didn't put in much effort to develop our friendship... I'll make it up to you someday...

For my JTW friends who are still around for the fireworks event at Ohori on August 1st, I hope to see you fantastic peeps one last time before I leave Japan! Keep in contact on Facebook, alright? (^-^)

Last month in Japan... :(

2010-07-10T22:32:00.006+08:00

It is often said that life as a Christian isn't a bed of roses. God puts us through the fires of trials and tribulation to strengthen our capacity. I learned the lesson firsthand. As a exchange student in the country which I absolutely adore, I should be indulging in the pleasures of life and liberated from worries...

But alas, that is not the case... I have come to the realization that a friend whom I initially thought would be my best buddy turns out to be a hypocritical liar who bore a grudge toward me for months. I may not have handled matters the way which each of my friends think is right, but I always have my friends' best interests at heart. I say this with a clear conscience.

To avoid him, I "exited" the clique we were in. Or rather, I was silently "ousted" from the group. He puts on a mask so easily and readily. Greeting me with a smile when I know a dagger is hidden behind his back. But I can't. Honesty has been one of my core principles ever since I was a little kid. And I expect that much from my friends. I just can't pretend everything is fine anymore. Looking at him in the eye became a chore. Hearing him boast about his extravagant life as a rich man's son to naive girls around him disgusts me to the very core of my being.

I almost succumbed to depression. Thank God for His comfort. Thank God for Fukuoka Harvest Church. Thank God for the wonderful Singaporean friends. Thank God for my girlfriend who has been by my side whenever I need her the most.

It's fine by me... Superficial booze parties are not my cup of tea... Neither is cooping myself up in the little world which they create for themselves... I'm here with a purpose and I'm moving toward my dream, so it doesn't matter to me anymore. I'll make full use of my last month in Japan to learn as much as I can about Japanese culture, to develop deeper friendships with my Japanese friends and to strengthen my relationship with my girlfriend.

I'll also be busy helping my Japanese buddy to settle in the Singaporean lifestyle when he comes to NUS for the following academic year. No time for worries... Time to move on...

Can I overcome this trial?

2010-06-23T00:17:00.002+08:00

Time flies, eh? I remember just awhile ago, I was feeling bewildered yet excited when I stepped into the departure hall all myself for the first time. Fast forward, it is already my final month in Japan.

Having said that, I should be seizing my final moments in Japan to have as much fun as possible, right? Yet, a heavy burden is weighing down on my weary heart... And I have no strength to carry on...

What could potentially be a lifelong brotherhood has crumbled to become a bitter, silent dissension. A misunderstanding has escalated into a grudge. As the saying goes, "ignorance is bliss". In cases such as this, I wish I never had the God-given gift of discernment...

He continues to greet me with a smile but I know behind the facade, things are not the same anymore. Confronted with hypocrisy, I was consumed with anger.

I didn't want to look like a sucker by initiating a reconciliation for the umpteen time. So, I chose the cool way out and acted as if I didn't need his friendship. He, on his part, wanted to prove to me that he's doing fine without me in his life. Lamenting the fragility of human relationships, for a moment, the devil had victory over my entire being.

I was tempted by the evil one to post derogatory comments on FB to spite him, but the lingering presence of the Holy Spirit hindered me from doing so. I'm a person with strong moral beliefs, but my lack of spiritual discipline would eventually lead me to the ruins.

I thank God for a fellow Singaporean sister-in-Christ, but most importantly, a fervent Christian girlfriend. Their words and advice offer me spiritual comfort. My sanity is kept intact despite the pain.

I have been too far away from God, and I cannot hear Him anymore. Despite so, I made a prayer to Him and I have hope in my heart that He is listening and He is guiding me back to the path which I have strayed from. I release the resentment which I have been harboring in my heart into His merciful hands.

In Your strength will I break through, Lord

All's well... :)

2010-06-17T23:41:00.003+08:00

One major conflict resolved! (^-^) But another conflict lingers on and which would never seem to cease... Conflicts, misunderstanding, distrust are inevitable when a bunch of international students with vastly different way of life and thinking try to live in harmony. I just need to stop being a SNAG (Sensitive New Age Guy) and focus on the more important issues at hand - experiencing the Japanese culture in its authenticity!

First dinner gathering with my lovely Japanese host family!

Everyone is crazy about World Cup these days. I mean it's understandable. It happens only once every 4 years and famous players from all over the world pit their skills against one another.

But I don't know... I just don't feel anything about it. I even got my masculinity questioned by a friend cos' "soccer is in the blood of men" haha! Maybe the rumor that tofu produces estrogen is true in some sense? I don't like soccer. I don't care about sports cars. I prefer strawberry ice-cream over chocolate. I prefer the color red over blue or black. I LIKE TEDDY BEARS! =P

Yet, I am secure in myself to say that I'm more man than what society defines to be a 'man'. I feel that true masculinity is the purity and integrity of character, unwavering amidst the winds of change. God made me just the way I am and I have no desire to conform to become someone else.

The sting of love...

2010-06-06T22:17:00.003+08:00

I promised not to talk about my girlfriend on my blog, given our circumstances... But I just need something, somewhere to pour my woes onto, and there can be no better place than right here on my own blog...

In a short span of 3 weeks of our relationship, we had 2 major conflicts. And both arose due to lack of proper communication. She's not telling me honestly how and what she feels, and thus I try too hard to communicate with her, and she thinks I'm imposing my will on her.

Never knew that love can be so tough... and painful... :'( I used to be a stoic guy i.e. believing that a real man doesn't shed tears, until I met God and wept in His presence. But crying in agony for a girl... That's something new to me...

We agreed to iron out our differences on Thurs but till then, she wants to keep a distance between us. I've grown too dependent upon her. Meeting her for dates every 2-3 days, keeping my fingers busy messaging her throughout the day. Thus, I reckon it's gonna be excruciating 4 days ahead... =(

I also got myself entangled in my best guy buddy's love matters (not as a third party, but as a busybody mediator, however I believe my interventions have eased misunderstandings between him and the girl and now, they've become a couple too) and incurred his wrath. We've made peace but I know he would never trust me anymore. We used to go to each other's rooms to chat regularly, and there was zilch for this whole week.

Remember I dissed the students who didn't dare venture beyond their country's clique? I bumped into a bunch of Hong Kong friends just now and envy crept into my sullen heart. I realize how pathetically vulnerable I am despite believing that I've become stronger through the trials which I had gone through in 2009.

Singaporean dinner with an elderly Japanese couple who stayed in Singapore for 20+ years

How would things have turned out if I played safe and invested more time and effort in my Singaporean friends and international students whom I am well-acquainted with? I would be consistently happy, but wouldn't achieve anything which furthers my future in Japan.

It doesn't mean I don't care about them. They're definitely friends whom I would like to stay connected with when I'm back in Singapore. I've been moving into denial of my identity as a Singaporean (I would refer to Singaporeans as "them" sometimes), but these wonderful people reminded me of the redeeming qualities of a Singaporean.

No matter how tough, no matter how painful, I will continue to press on and engage the risk bravely. I can't just stop after doing so much so far... Please keep me in your prayers, guys... :)

Osaka holidays: Day 4

2010-05-31T21:23:00.012+08:00

As the day of my return to Singapore inevitably draws nearer, I'm compelled and motivated to live the remaining days of my student life in Japan to the fullest. =) Which is why I seldom have time to update my blog regularly nowadays. But here's the overdue update on my trip which is almost a month ago. (>.<)

On day 4 of our trip, we went to Kyoto, THE place to go if you're into Japanese traditional culture. The city boasts of splendid, exquisite temples and shrines, traditional streets, bolstered by a rather vibrant modern youth culture in the town centre!

But the crowd was horribleee... =( It took us 1 hour to get to one attraction, when on normal days, it would probably take 20 minutes or so. Moral of the story: Don't travel to Japan during the Golden Week. =S

Gateway to the magnificent Kiyomizu-dera

A shrine dedicated to matters of love... Only in Japan! =D

Tired from climbing but still happy =)

Next up, another wildly popular tourist attraction, Kinkakuji (goldennn)

Waaa~ It's blinding my eyes!!! (okay, that was lame)

Back to the same spot I sat 2 years ago when I came to Japan with Jeffrey, my Japanese class buddy

Apparently famous spot but we only looked at it from a bridge. Should be interesting to dine with that ambience! (if it weren't that cold =S)

Everything is falling into place... Establishing strong friendships with my international friends, getting to socialize with new people frequently, re-connecting with Fukuoka Harvest Church, and of cos', meeting the love of my life. =)

I don't want to leave... But all things good must come to an end... Whatever it takes, I'll work my way back here someday...

Osaka holidays: Day 3

2010-05-21T21:39:00.011+08:00

These past 1 week + has been a whirlwind of events which I, myself, am trying my best to come to terms with the reality of matters. Friends close to my heart will know what I'm referring to. =)

Cos' of that, my blog updates have been on a crawl. But better now than never! Day 3 of my recent holidays to the Kansai region of Japan - Nara, the former capital city which holds the biggest Buddha statue in the world.

Cute deers as side-attractions so the kids wouldn't get bored with the temples :P

Docile deers are cute haha!

Todaiji, the great temple which houses the Buddha statue

Group shot!

Looks pretty scary huh? =S

Hugeee~

Feels like autumn!?

Insane number of people! Lesson learnt: Never travel to popular cities in Japan during Golden Week (>.<)

I think I care too much about my friends. Helping them till the extent that I may be seen as a busybody. Possibly angering them without a word of gratitude in return.

And also cos' I invest my emotions in the lives of my friends, if they don't reciprocate the same amount, I can't feel but feel disappointed, a little pissed, and cheated of my feelings.

I have a friend who makes promises too carelessly, and more often than not, he fails to follow through and I feel so bad inside, thinking if I did something wrong or he just doesn't care about me as a friend.

But oh well, what did I wish to expect? This is a short 4 month exchange program and everyone just wants to have fun and doesn't care to build long-lasting relationships.

I've got someone more important in my life to focus on now, so I'm just gotta shut out my emotions for the time being. =)

The bliss of love~

2010-05-15T23:41:00.003+08:00

Just came back from my first ever date with a girl whom I like! (^-^) After 23 long years of staying single all the while, I finally know what it feels to be in love. =)

We've only met 2 weeks ago so she can't ascertain if I'm really the guy she's looking for, and if it is within God's will. But it's going smoothly, and I'll continue to do my best to match up with her faith so that she'll come to embrace me as her confidant and hopefully, boyfriend. =)

However, there are some complicated circumstances which we have to face so I can't post any (future) pics on FB, nor blog about our progress any longer.

If anybody's interested, please feel free to send me a personal email! =D I'll be glad to share the joy with my buddies. =)

Osaka holidays: Day 2~

2010-05-11T23:45:00.010+08:00

Long time no see, Osaka! (^^) I'm still not a big fan of the place because it's much more rowdier and dirtier than most of the other developed urban cities in Japan e.g. Tokyo. But it is definitely worth the trip to diversify one's perspective about Japan!

Good-looking guys, eh? =X

Tranquil, serene atmosphere to kick-start the day of sightseeing in Osaka!

Osaka Castle in sight!

Great shot! (^^)

A rare chance to experience a Japanese university school festival! Something that you can never do if you go as a mere tourist :)

Statue of Liberty? (lol)

We jokingly remarked that my Chinese friend looked like Aaron Kwok with this sunglasses on, so I tried to joke that I look like Andy Lau, and my friends were trying hard to suppress their laughter... :(

I hate blur photos!!! But anyway, this is Billiken, the resident deity of Osaka. Cute, eh? (rofl) :D

Tsutenkaku Tower... It's really pretty when it lights up at night

I don't know why, but there's a sudden urge to seize every moment, every opportunity, every single second when I'm here in Japan. The lazy bum I was in Singapore is nonexistent in Japan. :P

I wake up no later than 9 AM everyday. I go out of my way to meet friends to build relationships, until as late as midnight. I'm actually enthusiastic to study in the library nowadays (maybe because I befriended a very pretty Japanese girl who's always studying in the library :D).

And onto my main point... Finally after 23 long years of passivity, I actually confessed to a girl that I like her. Okay, not exactly, since I only met her recently. I'm not that shallow, okay. :P But I did tell her that I had the "fall head over heels" feeling when I first saw her, and she fits exactly according to my criteria for a girlfriend.

In just... 1-2 days of getting to know her (lol)! Maybe I'm just sick and tired of waiting for the "right one" who may never be a reality at all. Plus the fact that she's a fervent Christian herself, which is extremely rare in Japan.

For a Japanese girl, my actions would be shocking because Japanese guys are more reserved and seldom say such matters directly. In fact, it is shocking to myself as well, because I have never confessed about my feelings to a girl ever in my life.

Despite that, we're still emailing frequently and we're open to get to know each other better. I hope it leads to something. Because if this is not the chance which God has put in place for me, I might end up becoming a bachelor for life. (>.<)

I'll definitely keep you guys updated about my progress. :)

Back in Kansai

2010-05-07T22:53:00.012+08:00

Just barely a month after I started school proper, I had almost a week long holiday aptly named "Golden Week" (indeed lol). Thanks to my Singaporean friend Reina who did most of the planning (お疲れ様でした！＾＾), a bunch of close friends and I went on a vacation to Osaka.

Kicked off things with a visit to a shrine in Kobe!

My fellow zodiac "brother" from another (Korean) mother. Life would be boring without this witty friend of mine. :)

Yep, starting to sink in that I'm back in Kobe after 2 years!

The obligatory crazy jump pose :P

Aftermath of the Great Hanshin earthquake...

Lawl :D

I didn't know I own such a posh mansion in the richest area of Kobe. :P

Grand daddy of Jurong Point's Mr Crabby :D

Rong Yi, a soft-spoken guy from China

Great yakisoba dinner to reward ourselves for a tiring day of traveling!

Counting down to the day when I have to return to Singapore... Exactly about 3 months from now... Every minute is so precious and I'm trying my best to maximize every moment to the fullest.

My project about Japanese dramas grind to a halt when my group mates realize we have no common favorite drama which we are sufficiently interested in to analyze and report on. Reina suggested that we can watch a drama together, but I was quite against the idea cos' I've no time to waste on dramas when I have the rare opportunity to physically experience Japanese culture for myself!

For the same reason, I'm breaking out of my shy demeanor and am taking the initiative to know EVERY Japanese person whom I come across. Pushing aside the awkwardness when I interact with pretty girls (being good friends with pretty E441 sisters helps alot HAHA :D). Requesting for 2 conversation partners when most of my friends only requested for 1.

In barely over a month, I have made so many eventful memories. I don't want to even think of the day when I have to say my painful goodbyes to Japan and my friends. Just gonna live by the day. Learn as much as I can while it lasts. Forge lasting friendships which will withstand the test of time and space. And of course... play hard and enjoy life! :P

2010-04-23T23:53:00.012+08:00

Whew... Just got back from a casual dinner party organized by the Koreans in my dorm. I finally got a taste of the hectic social life of a student living in a dorm. I was supposed to work on my research essay but got held back for socializing with my friends. Oh shucks... Well, at least I have 4-5 hours tomorrow just by myself so I'm gonna do as much work as I can.

The youths of Fukuoka Harvest Church!

I don't know if I will ever develop a strong friendship with any one of them... Elaine, my Singaporean friend who attends church with me, told me that she took half a year to feel more comfortable with the people (and for the people to feel comfortable with her). I don't have the luxury of time. Just 3 more months to go and I'm back in boring ol' Singapore...

If I ever get a chance to develop friendships in the church, Katsu will be the first cos' he's such a terrific guy who's interested in the vast world outside of Japan (because Japanese can become so insular)

In Kyushu University's school magazine, there's a pretty cute girl on the cover and I was remarking to my friends that's the type of girl whom I would go for. And guess what, just yesterday, I spotted her (of all people) in the lunch hour crowd and I just knew it was her although I couldn't confirm my guess.

But thankfully, I saw a mutual friend with her, and I asked her via email to validate my guess, and I was right! Never had this feeling for a long time... Where the crowds fade in the background and all I could see was her. Then, my world came crashing down when my friend told me that the girl already has a boyfriend. (=.=)

Sorry, I had to rant to restore peace to my emotions (lol). There are a few other cute Japanese girls in my social circle, but I'm just too picky. I don't know if it's a good or bad thing. On one hand, I'm glad to claim that I'm gonna make my first relationship the last as well i.e. serious about the relationship, consideration of marriage etc. On the other hand, I might never get a partner if my expectations are way too high.

Oh, what a dilemma. It's so hard to find a cute, demure Japanese girl who has a good character and heart, and is a Christian or at least, open to Christianity. I don't know... I may have to disappoint you guys who have been rooting for me to get a Japanese girlfriend... (>.<)

Just enjoying the friendships for now, I guess! (Can you spot me? Haha, it's like the "Where's Wally" game, yeah? :P)

Yeah, I'm having fun... :D

I was just told by my Romanian girl-friend that I'm hard to figure out. Is that a compliment? Haha, I guess in a way, it is. I look geeky in some aspects (the spectacles maybe?), but I prove that I keep up with fashion with my clothes and hairstyle. Sometimes, I feel and act a little bit awkward around girls, but at other times, I'm cool and gentlemanly.

And that's just the surface of who I really am inside. It might take a lifetime to understand how deeply intriguing I truly am. Because even I don't understand myself sometimes. God is moving in my life in ways which even I can't describe. I'm loving my gradual transformation. I love being who I am.

Plenty of unrelated random stuff all jumbled up in a single blog post. I apologize and I thank you if you manage to stay with me till the end. :P Can't wait for Sunday because I'll be going to Nagasaki for a day trip with my close friends!

2010-04-18T17:29:00.007+08:00

Celebrated my Korean buddy, Myungshin's birthday yesterday with a bunch of close-knit coursemates! Had a great time at a yakiniku restaurant with free flow food and drinks and we were attempting to eat as much as we could in the 90 minutes time limit. =P

Hiro, a sporty guy who will always take the initiative to organize outings for us. What a great guy he is! :)

Ryoko, a cute Japanese girl! :D So glad to have Japanese friends such as her around although school is getting busy.

After dinner, we went to a bowling alley near our dorm to play 3 (!) games despite our weary bodies. When I thought I would be leaving after the games, we went over to the arcade section and we played batting (electronically controlled baseball) and ehhh, I spent 1400 Yen on prize-catchers cos' I couldn't resist Rilakuma. (>.<)

By the grace of God, I had the chance to meet a half-Korean, half-Japanese Russian who was interested to look for a church here in Fukuoka. I don't even know how we went into the topic of religion, but I believe it's God's divine appointment. :)

Beside Johnny is the girl which I've mentioned. Her name is Nastya and a second miracle happened cos' her friend (beside her), Katya, was willing to come to church service!

Some Japanese church members joined in!

Waaa... So pretty hor? :P

So handsome hor? Ops =X

The group photos are taken with other people's cameras, so I gotta wait for them to upload to FB before I can share with you guys.

Somehow, I still feel kinda detached from the church. One might think that a small family church is cosy, but think of it another way, it's very hard to fit in if the family has been established.

Us foreigners are always left out of the fun activities which they usually engage within their own social circle. Which was why I decided to forgo the youth camp and go for a holiday with university friends who are actually interested in my life.

I thought I had my journey in Japan mapped out, but seems like it's inevitable for a diversion. I guess God is trying to keep me on my toes, eh?

Some thoughts spiralling in my mind thus far...

2010-04-10T22:58:00.006+08:00

As you might notice by now, the interesting pictures are beginning to dwindle in numbers cos' things quieten down a little as school have started. As I've mentioned time and time again, I'm not in Japan just to have fun, but to challenge my thought life, as well as physical and mental capabilities to cope with living abroad independently.

So, ummm... I'll just bore you a little with my thoughts thus far for my stay in Japan...

It sounds kinda weird but observing people is the best pastime a person who is inclined to philosophy can have. I don't wish to evolve into a haughty know-it-all philosopher but I pursue intellect in this area so that I can properly shape my mind to the likeness of Christ and protect myself from negative external influences.

It's interesting to see the dynamism of social interaction in an international setting. How certain people form cliques due to the comfort, familiarity and similarity of cultures. How goody-two-shoes are influenced by negative traits portrayed by other people with greater sphere of influence, maybe cos' of peer pressure or simply, they just want to fit in the "in" group. How people of vastly different nationalities and complete opposite backgrounds become love couples in a matter of weeks or months probably due to the intrigue of the "mysterious" or loneliness away from home.

I thank God for City Harvest Church, despite all the negative criticisms. All my mentors in church have given my valuable advice on the ways to protect my mind in a worldly environment. Despite the sufferings, I'm grateful for NS and my chronic ailments, cos' the trials through the fire have unlocked the potential of my mind.

I've been tweeting alot about Korean girls praising various aspects of me, but my intention isn't to boast. I shall put my thoughts into concrete words cos' when I look back at my experiences in Japan, I might just forget what I was thinking back then.

#1: Maximize your unique traits

I've been told by 5 Korean girls (actually 2 told my Korean buddy who conveyed the message to me) that I have a nice deep voice, and it's refreshing cos' Japanese guys usually have high-pitched voices (1 girl actually said that they can't differentiate between a male Japanese voice and female Japanese voice GOSH).

Humans are attracted by characteristic uniqueness, strong unwavering beliefs, and an approachable personality. I knew that looks aren't everything, but people's assessment of us go beyond character and personality, and that's relatively new to me (I did have an inkling of it, but things became clearer when I came here). We have to find the X-factor within ourselves to appeal to people around us.

Fashion is a viable way to channel our appeal. I like glittery t-shirts with elaborate prints. Some people find it flashy but I don't care. I like plush toys and I have a cute seal key holder hanging out of my pocket and a Rilakuma keychain hanging from my bag. Some people find it childish for a big guy like me, but I seriously don't care.

Discover your unique traits today. Don't follow the crowd and just be a nobody in the sea of conformists. Be a somebody, and be brave to face societal rejections (from shallow people whom you shouldn't even be bothered to care about).

#2: Language is the entry ticket to a whole new world

Singapore is a boring place. It's a concrete jungle over-populated with artificially spruced up tourist attractions which locals don't give a rat's ass about and obscenely saturated with shopping malls (is it really that necessary to build Orchard Central and Somerset@313 when Ion Orchard could have covered all grounds?). Agree?

Thus, I'll be surprised to even find a single soul who's interested in Singapore in Japan. Heck, I'll be grateful if they know Singapore is not in China. But my Japanese buddy is planning a 1-year exchange to NUS, and my Korean friend is planning to visit Singapore in the upcoming long holidays we have in May!

And what exactly are they impressed with? Our bilingual ability. It's huge cos' most other Asians struggle with English. I told a Korean girl that cos' we're learning 2 (for people like me, 3) languages, we're good in neither cos' we divide our efforts. But she said something which gave me food for thought. Even if we're not good at the languages, as long as we have a comfortable level of proficiency to communicate, we can make friends from all around the world.

We're treat it like nothing cos' we've grew complacent and comfortable in a Singaporean environment. But really, we should use this unique trait of ours (remember #1 above?) as a tool to broaden our horizons. After coming here and experiencing life in a foreign environment, I realized how narrow-minded I am, despite my inclination to philosophy. There's so much out there in the world, and Singapore is too small to quench our thirst for knowledge.

I'm glad I am studying Japanese, despite the painful thousands of dollars investment in it. And I'm thankful my motivation to learn the language is properly steered. I'm not misguided or influenced by some trashy pop culture like some Singaporeans who pick up a 3rd language.

Fact #1: Anime and manga are over-exaggerations of the typical Japanese life. I find it disgusting to see people on the streets imitating language used in anime and manga and think they're so uber cool. Get a life, dawg!

Fact #2: All the actors and actresses in Korean pop culture are TOO good-looking. The common Korea people are plain-looking just like us Chinese. And no, they don't have elaborate palaces and extravagant mansions, which you see in dramas such as Princess Hours and Boys Over Flowers, all around the country.

Fact #3: Taiwanese stars are unbelievably pretty-faced as well. But in reality, the people are poor imitators of Japanese and Korean popular culture esp. fashion. It's not a bad place if you explore the authentic areas, but if you seek modernity, if I were you, I would rather go Korea or Japan.

I'd definitely encourage anyone who's interested to pick up a new language to go for it. Just a offering a word of caution here cos' I don't want any of my friends to regret their decisions after investing a substantial amount of money in language classes. Use it for a purpose, be it studies or work abroad, or actively seeking to broaden your social circle by including native speakers of the language you're learning. Wanting to understand anime, manga and TV dramas is mehhh fine by me, but in my opinion, that shouldn't be the sole reason for learning a language.

The typical Singaporean would go "traveling is secondary. I gotta save up for my marriage, car and house and my children's education". While that is fine by me, for me, I would live in basic comfort and spend the rest of my savings on traveling. You can learn so much just by seeing more of the world and experiencing different cultures.

Okay, I'm running a little overtime here. Jon Tan said I was lorh sorh, and here I am, writing a superbly long blog post. I'm afraid Kenneth will be the only guy who can sustain reading until the end. If he visits my blog, that is. :P Just for food for thought to chew on. I'll get back to more lighthearted posting tomorrow or the day after. Ciao!

Another unique experience!

2010-04-07T22:43:00.012+08:00

Usually when school starts, students all over the world moan in despair. But I had my first lesson today and I was intrigued from the start to finish. I have such a great professor who is a great thinker and teacher. So many philosophical concepts taught today, and Japan is the ideal society to take as a basis because it has so many facets and differences from other Asian societies. Kenneth would have been good friends with my professor if he were here. :P

Do you spot a cute Japanese girl? Thus far, from all the girls I've met so far, I kinda like her (looks), but don't really know her well enough to understand her character and personality. But anyway, I'm still keeping my options open. :P

When I bought my phone, I was given free tickets to a baseball match in Fukuoka's famous Yahoo! Dome. Seemed like I had the better end of the deal cos' my other friends got some crappy folder and Macdonald's (not even Starbucks!) coffee vouchers.

Surprisingly, Vanessa (the American girl from the previous post) was eager to accompany me (cos' she thought I had more tickets). Was a little nervous, as I'd always be when I'm around cute girls esp. on a one-on-one scenario. But I guess I did fine. :P Besides having a brief hiccup of losing my way back to the dorm. (=.=)

I love cheerleaders! (^-^)

The staff had huge backpacks containing beer and they pour it out like how petrol is pumped into a car. And they have to make their rounds around a section of the stadium. Damn, this work is tough and I admire the Japanese for being so down-to-earth earning a humble living.

The girl in the picture is quite cute. If she were a Singaporean, she would probably have wild fantasies of becoming the next top model and probably end up getting scammed for sex by a phony model recruiter.

Not generalizing of cos'... Thankfully, none of my friends are that stupid, but we do see such cases occasionally in the papers... I guess in a way, we have so much to learn from other Asian cultures, in this case, Japan. Almost 70% of my Japanese friends thus far are working part-time to finance their university education and/or family.

Yeah, they have plenty of flaws, just like any normal human being would, and esp. in a rigid, constricted Japanese society, but I'll always be in awe and respect for them.

A batter preparing to give a good swing for hopefully, a home run

Seems like it's a ritual for fans to have these yellow balloons and they release it at a certain point of a match. It's quite an amazing sight to see all these balloons whizzing in the air, tho' it reminds me of a disturbing imagery. (=.=) Forget it if you don't get it. :P

I'm sorry, I just love cheerleaders... :D

And it's a sweet victory for the beloved hometown heroes!

Life is good! Went bowling with my Korean friend and his Japanese buddy, planning a trip to Okinawa during a 5 days holiday in May, and was complimented by a hot Korean girl regarding my looks and fashion sense while we were having dinner together. (^-^)

Around this time, alot of my friends are working doubly hard for project deadlines and final exams, and I feel a little guilty to ramble on and on about my exciting life in Japan. But if I have to worry about everybody's judgment, this blog will go nowhere. So, I thank you if you're still reading this, and I sincerely wish you all the best in all your endeavors.

Till then again, see you! :)

Welcome party just for us new students!

2010-04-05T22:17:00.013+08:00

Finally settled my phone, insurance, and housekeeping matters! Gosh, I'm beat as hell, but I'm still enjoying every single second. Just had Japanese placement test this morning and I fared atrociously. Apparently, my "advanced" qualification in Singapore is only on par with my university's "intermediate". (=.=)

Just some leftover photos from my welcome trip to Beppu...

Surrounded by Caucasian beauties! Annika, a German, on the left. And Vanessa, an American on the right.

Joined by Reina, my Singaporean friend, on the left. And Mengyao, a young student from China.

An extravagant welcome party awaited us the day after we returned back to our dormitories from Beppu! Chinese buffet with a little Western and Japanese, with free flow desserts and liquor. I'm becoming so fat. (=.=) Didn't eat much because I was socializing more than I was eating. I guess everyone did the same so the restaurant manager should be laughing all the way to the bank...

Kazu, my Japanese buddy, on the left. Park, an "ikemen" (handsome guy) Korean. And Zaf (not sure if that's the right spelling), he's superbly funny. :P

Now, joined by a Japanese "ikemen", Moricos (cos' he likes a volleyball player named Marcos and decided to adopt a nickname after him).

Niroch, the gorgeous Swedish girl whom I've mentioned before. (Ok, you guys might be wondering if I was drunk, but I'm NOT! Everyone knows how alcohol has a good effect on my cheeks... =.=)

More Japanese cuties... Yay! :) Carolina, a French girl, on the right.

A short SG reunion...

Kieran, a 193 cm (!) tall American. And Haley, a bubbly Vietnamese American.

Nooo... Why is my face so dark in the background in this picture? She's Nagisa, a final year student in Dentistry. Haven't got the chance to know her better yet, but we'll see.

Fumiko, a very dedicated and nice girl who took care of all our needs during the Beppu trip

Akemi, a good friend of my Japanese buddy Kazu!

Misaki, a Japanese buddy to one of my Singaporean friends, but she has already graduated and started working...

I've always like observing people, esp. in an international setting such as this. Opening my eyes to see the dynamism and interaction among people from different nations and backgrounds truly made me a wiser man.

It's natural to lay back into the comfort of familiarity. Asians stick with Asians, esp. if they speak the same mother tongue e.g. Chinese from SG, China, HK, Taiwan etc. Caucasians stick with Caucasians. And esp. those who aren't confident in their Japanese, and people who just want to have a fun time without a serious interest in Japan or its culture.

Screw that. I came here to learn so much more. I just can't dip back into the rut which I was in for the past few years. I'm gonna embarrass myself unconsciously doing things which would be in conflict with other cultures, or speaking broken Japanese hoping people would understand.

But I just don't have the privilege to care about my pride. Carpe diem, this is the one and only opportunity for me to open up.

I'll be needing to practise my Japanese a little cos' tomorrow, there's an interview test to gauge our speaking capabilities. I'll sign off here. Ciao! :D

Welcome trip to Beppu!

2010-04-02T22:58:00.024+08:00

Is there any university which offers a welcome trip with fully paid transport, meals and lodging? Hot dang, I'm so glad that I chose this SEP! :D

Every meal is superbly sumptuous!

My professor is the biggest guy in the photo :D

Reina, my NUS acquaintance who happened to be on the same program as I am, and we're getting to know each other better by the day :)

Oh yay! My first picture with a Japanese girl. :P The picture doesn't do her justice cos' she looks better in person...

A magnificent torii, gateway to the shrine

Finally, we reached the shrine!

Japanese people praying to their Shinto gods

One site of the famous "nine hells of Beppu" (Don't be afraid... It's nothing satanic about it... It's just a flavorful name to describe the place :P)

Hot sulfuric gases which smell terribly similar to farts

Ahhh... After watching big-scale communal dinners in dramas and documentaries, I finally had a chance to experience it myself!

Myungshin, a happy-go-lucky Korean guy whom I warmed up to naturally! We're rather good friends now after just 3 days of friendship :)

We went to a monkey park for today... Have you ever seen so MANY monkeys in your entire life!?

Be good malao and please don't scratch me (>.<) Errr... LOL!

An aquarium is right beside the monkey park. Nice 'fishy' effect here :P

Wooo... Colorful jellyfish...

Hey, Mr Walrus!

Bought this cute seal key holder as a momento! :D

Went to an SQ event downtown to support our Singaporean compatriots working for SIA!

Singaporean fellowship in Fukuoka!

I'm so glad I took the plunge and enrolled myself in this exchange program despite my worries and uncertainty. More than just the fun, I'm maturing as a person as I am exposed to so many different cultures all over the globe and I learn to see things through their perspectives.

I sat beside a gorgeous Swedish girl and we talked about dreams and ambitions from our respective point of view. I shared a hotel room with an American, Belgian and Hong Konger, and had a good chat with the Hong Konger regarding education and our future careers, and with the Belgian regarding Christianity.

I'll be having a welcome party at a Chinese buffet restaurant with free flow liquor tomorrow. Why do I have a bad feeling that I'll be pissed drunk for the 2nd time ever in my life? (>.<) Thanks for reading, guys! Do chat with me online if you have the time! :)

Updates for the week!

2010-03-31T22:22:00.010+08:00

Whew... It has been 3 hectic days of settling in my dorm. I finally understood my mum's feelings as a dedicated house-maker despite being tied down by a stressful job. It's just... crazy... I made 3-4 trips to the supermarket to buy everything I need for my 4 months of stay, and there are still a few things which I've overlooked and I gotta get it soon. (=.=)

The Indonesian girl who looks like Terri *LOL*! Okay... Maybe not on photos but when I met her, my first impression was that she looks like Terri :P

The bubbly half-Spanish half-Japanese girl which I mentioned in the previous post is right beside me :)

My Singaporean friend studying in the same university takes quite good shots!

We should transcend beyond a 'zi-pai' mentality and help one another take good shots of one another! :)

Probably one of the last time I'll be taking photos of sakura cos' it'll be falling off soon... :(

Beside me is Charlene, an outgoing and approachable girl also studying under the same course as I am. Beside her is Elaine, the Singaporean girl who goes to Fukuoka Harvest Church with me (and took my photos shown above).

And that's Reiko, a Singaporean who married a Japanese. Incredibly funny and motherly, kinda reminds me of KC's mum. :) Haha, I can't wait to eat her laksa when her mother visits her in May, together with hebi and laksa paste!

The guy behind is Chuu Yong, a guy living in Fukuoka for years as a translator and graduate student. He's *gasp* 40, but he looks like he's in his early 30s. Great guy to talk to, had dinner with him after the sakura-viewing.

I was over-stricken with dismay when I realized there are so many Singaporeans in Fukuoka than I had expected, cos' I wanted to escape the Singaporean culture and totally immerse myself in the Japanese culture.

But looking back, I'm grateful to know these people cos' I feel that God placed them specifically in my life to bless me and take me to heights which I never dream I would attain. Esp. since Elaine has better knowledge of the church settings here, and Chuu Yong can definitely offer me valuable advice if I wanted to stay in Japan for the long term.

WOOHOO! Rilakuma! Cute :)

KC bro, look what I bought LOL!

:)))

Alright, Jon Tan, u can go OMG right now :P

I'll be leaving the dorm 2 days for a welcome trip to Beppu. It's THE most famous place for onsen in Japan, and as an onsen lover, I just can't wait! Gotta go pack my stuff and wake up early tomorrow, so I'll bid you guys farewell for now! ... But not for long... :)

Fukuoka Harvest Church!

2010-03-28T22:04:00.015+08:00

Hey guys, I'm back again! :) As you guys would have already known, I went to Fukuoka Harvest Church today! Ending my 5 days of leisure break with a touch of spirituality sure feels good. (^-^)

Oh, did I mention about this? A Singaporean acquaintance of mine is also a Christian and she happened to chance upon Fukuoka Harvest Church when she was looking for a church to attend last year. How coincidental is that? It's definitely God's favor. :)

After months of anticipation, I'm finally in FUKUOKA HARVEST CHURCH! :D

The leftmost guy is Katsu, a funny and friendly guy who learn English just by traveling to many different countries! How awesome is that? Take note of the rightmost guy cos' I'll be mentioning him later...

As our pastors would say... "The service has ended but fellowship has just begun!" :)

In my opinion, I think the Japanese has the best genes in Asia. I'm seeing so many good-looking people everyday, every minute. In case you might think I'm biased cos' I like Japanese girls, I'm actually referring to the guys! The church girls are quite normal-looking (for Japanese girls) but the guys particularly stand out.

The guy I told you to take note of? He's almost a carbon copy of Wilber Pan. If I have the chance to take a photo with him, I'll post it up for you girls to see and judge. :)

Toma Ikuta, a famous pretty face actor in Japan. And yeah, there's a guy who looks exactly like him.

And uhhh, I got to know 2 Indonesian students who are attending the church as well. And there's a girl who can pass off as Terri's twin sister. O.M.G! O.M.G! O.M.G! (>.<) And it so happened today that they planned a sakura-viewing cum BBQ gathering after service. And I was still worrying what I should do in the afternoon. :P

During the sakura season, everyone comes out for such gatherings. (Those people are not from my church. Just some random ojisan and obasan :P)

The guy I talked about? He's the one wearing the white t-shirt but can only see his side profile. Hehe, I'll leave it up to your imagination :D

We went back to the church to wash and keep the BBQ stuff, and they sent me and my friends back to the station just before sunset.

I didn't get to know (at least, talk for a good 15 minutes) many Japanese, except those who are very open to foreign cultures, such as Katsu (the BV in a few pics up). It's really difficult to enter their social circles. Suddenly, I just had the feeling to give up finding my first ever GF HAHA!

A bubbly and humorous half-Spanish, half-Japanese girl remarked "Oh yay, we have our own "gaijin" gathering!". "Gaikokujin" is the formal term to refer to 外国人. "Gaijin" has negative connotations cos' it translates as 外人, which makes us feel like aliens. The need to report to the town council for our "alien registration" doesn't feel good as well. (=.=)

Oh well, it's just the first meeting... I'll have plenty of time to (hopefully) build good relationships with the youths of Fukuoka Harvest Church.

I've not been exploring the area around my station (their underground shopping is THAT intensive that I don't have a need to shop outside of it), so I decided to do so

I had triple cheese baked rice 3 days ago, and just now, I had QUADRUPLE cheese pizza... Although I can't tell the difference (=.=)

The obligatory cam-whore of the day! :D The flash had a cool effect here so I kept the photo. I'm having so much fun mixing and matching my dressing. The weather is ideal for me to do so. :) I need to keep up with the ever stylish Japanese guys!

I'll be moving into my dormitory tomorrow and I just, just, just can't wait to unpack my stupid luggage. Grrr... And it'll be the official start of my life as a student in Japan! Thanks for reading and good night, guys!

An eye-opener...

2010-03-27T22:37:00.021+08:00

Back from a tiring but fulfilling day at a famous traditional temple and peaceful countryside out of the city. :)

I was expecting a quiet little temple but woah!

Omochi, or as we Singaporeans know it as muah-chee... Crispy crust with piping hot sweet azuki (red bean) in it!

The gateway to the magnificent temple

HAHA, I'm just not cut out for this kinda act cute pose. I wonder how Japanese, even guys, do it so naturally

I just made friends with a popular historical figure, Sakamoto Ryoma :)

More sakura... It's gonna get prettier by the day!

What I had for lunch... :D

I felt a little guilty when he taught me about the temple rituals and had me do it too but I told myself "Be a Daniel". As long as my conscience is clear. :) And I also bought the zodiac keychain (I'm a tiger rawrrr) and good blessings charm for ermmm love? :P

Next up, my friend brought me to a peaceful countryside called Yanagawa with a famous tourist attraction - an hour boat ride around the city

"Be a Daniel" Round 2... LOL! My friend was so enthusiastic about it, I just couldn't reject his suggestion... U guys know how important my hair is :P

With beautiful sakura all around the boat route, it was very refreshing :)

Just right above me :)

Okok, I swear this is the last pic for sakura :P

Besides sakura, there are other beautiful flowers too!

Quack quack! The boatman gave us some feed and the ducks were fighting for it lol!

The salespeople of these riverside stores were relentlessly persuading us to stop and buy their stuff (=.=)

Plenty of low bridges... I gradually felt gratitude to my friend who had me put on the funny hat lol!

Queuing outside a popular 'yatai' (makeshift food vendors) for dinner

Fried ramen for dinner! Amazingly delicious :P

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What were you waiting for? My daily camwhore pic? HAHA! I wore about the same as 2 days ago so I didn't bother. :P Tomorrow, I'll be going to Fukuoka Harvest Church to attend their service for the first time ever!

Feeling a little nervous but at the same time, exciting as well! Just as how I gotten used to everything in Japan (the weather, the customs and habits, getting used to seeing more good-looking people (lol), speaking in Japanese) in 3 short days, I'll be ready for this as well!

Good night, folks! :)

Probably the last me-time I would have... :)

2010-03-26T21:21:00.024+08:00

Another day by myself... Ain't a bad thing cos' I'm enjoying the freedom I have! :) Done alot of things in the past few days which I never would have fathom my shy, timid self would do!

The caption basically means while you're traveling, you'd be having fun on the trains and it'll be over in a flash. But the picture depicts a family playing poker. A little skewed representation, if you ask me... :S

I didn't know Tohoshinki is THAT huge in Japan. Throngs of girls flock to a booth designated for their albums in HMV. I think I was the only guy around... (=.=)

Waaa so cute! KC bro, you want this? LoL! :D

And shortly after, I discovered this store! Oh gosh, so cute, I love it! (^-^)

Enough of the busy city life and relax awhile at this park which is popular with the locals...

Sakura season is starting... :)

I don't think I walked the whole of Chinese Garden in my 23 years of life in Singapore but here I was, completing the 2km around the park in a foreign land (=.=)

Yo KC bro, look who's here!

More pics just for you my best pal! :)

One big happy family! :D

The gigantic Fukuoka Yahoo! Dome for their popular baseball events. It's everything what S-League wants to achieve but would never ever attain. Just look to the bottom of the photo... The throngs of people flocking to watch their local heroes fight to the top of Japan's baseball league. Amazing...

Do you believe this is made out of tidbits? With the theme of 7 wonders of the world (Taj Mahal here), F&B students engage in this competition to create the most visually appealing structure made out of mere snacks!

For the Chinese, we have the Great Wall of China :)

Leaning Tower of Pisa!

Miyajima! One of the 3 sights of Japan, my greatest desire to go someday (after school ends perhaps :P)

I guess this is Easter Island? Cute... :P

Egypt, yet another place I would want to go to when I'm feeling adventurous enough. I used to be fascinated with pyramids and mummies when I was a kid. :)

Bought more clothes that shouts ME!!!

Usually, the English words would be utter gibberish. This one's fine though the phrasing is a little funny, but the message behind it is surprisingly intellectually deep!

A new coordinated dressing I came up with this morning! Finally put my G2000 smart casual jacket which I wore for my brother's wedding to good use. I think I was subtly influenced by Su-Ju when I was crazy about "Sorry Sorry" 2 months ago. (=.=)

Tomorrow's gonna be fun cos' my Japanese friend will be bringing me to the famous temple nearby Fukuoka, as well as those makeshift ramen stores (which you'll usually see in J-doramas ^^). I hope everyone is doing well? Please update me on what's happening in Singapore if you're free. :) Good night, folks!

A healthy dose of me-time for today :)

2010-03-25T19:03:00.017+08:00

With no one to accompany me today, I set off for another new experience - wandering the streets of a foreign country ALONE. :) My army knowledge was finally of practical use. Getting lost in dark jungles with commando insects stinging me has made me more street smart than before. :)

Every major station has a City Link kinda concept... Cool and convenient huh?

Triple cheese bacon baked rice for lunch!

Delicious looking and tasting Japanese sweets is gonna make me lose to Wendy in our private "Biggest Loser" challenge :(

Can't resist buying Japanese clothes! This totally shouts ME! :D

Went to Canal City, a "Vivocity" kinda shopping complex

Woohoo, a Pokemon store! I feel like a kid all over again. :)

Ramen museum in a shopping complex? Weird but interesting...

Woof!

RAWR!

Grrr... (Smoke actually comes out from its nostrils)

Ramen and fried rice for dinner :)

Cam-whore to end the day!

I'm loving the cold weather... I can coordinate my dressing without worrying about sweating. My Japanese friend prefers sunny weather. I guess it's universal for the saying "the grass is always greener on the other side"?

Okay, I'm off to shower and prepare for an early night. Good night, folks. :)

I can't believe I'm truly already in Japan :D

2010-03-24T15:42:00.017+08:00

What a whirlwind of events leading up to my departure to Japan! Having a headache squeezing everything I need into the luggage, with the occasional nagging from my mum. Eating out with my family at Crystal Jade (seldom had one in ages) tasting crappy mapo tofu. Last gathering with my beloved E441 brothers and sisters in Christ (with a guest appearance from my most revered senpai, Qianli :D).

Yo jajabings, I'll miss you too! :D

LOL! Can tell that Jon Goh is a guai guai zai who never had ah beng tendencies at all :P

Cia-ee & Val-ee!!! :D Appreciating these rekindled friendships (I know I over-used the word 'rekindled' :P)

アデリンーさん！Thanks for taking time to prepare a small gift for me despite your busyness! :D

Powerful spiritual warriors who rushed down after leader's meeting just to send me off! ...Except for one... (OPS just kidding la :P)

Ok la, don't get angry huh? :) Our 'Biggest Loser' challenge officially commenced yesterday! Loser will treat the winner Fullerton buffet or something, okay? :P

Janet, ever the creative, vibrant and daring person she is, decided to come up with this weird fighting pose that's a mix of Street Fighter and L4D2 LOL!

Becoming the 2nd last person to board the flight gate. (=.=) Sitting in between an ah beng donning flashy Christian Audigier T-shirt and dreadlocks, and a peaceful-looking ah pek. :S Becoming the LAST person to go through immigration counter (cos' I forgot to put a pen in my pocket so I couldn't fill up the embarkation card on board the plane).

Discovering one of the 2 Japanese guys who came to fetch me had his fly wide open but didn't dare to tell him cos' he seemed like the typical Japanese guy with tons of ego. Realizing my misconception of the Japanese head coordinator being an seasoned old veteran is utterly wrong and she turned out to be a rather cute woman in her mid-late 20s.

Sakura is so beautiful... And it's not even in full bloom!

And uhhh, if I'm awed by it and I'm not usually a flower lover, it means it is REALLY pretty to admire in person

I have such a great Japanese buddy attached to me for my stay in Fukuoka. Friendly, warm, witty guy who is actually interested in Singapore whereas most of the other typical Japanese are usually pro-Western. He is trying to apply for an SEP to NUS next semester, so ladies, cross your fingers! :P He's not exactly the Japanese cute boy kinda look, but I feel that his character surpasses skin-deep superficiality. (Shan't post his pic here cos' some Japanese are sensitive about displaying their pic online for everyone to see)

I didn't know the red plates are laced with thick wasabi and when I put the whole sushi into my mouth, my nose was flaring... Literally... (=.=)

You're reading this post because I'm slacking in my hotel now! I can't seem to sleep on board aeroplanes so I'll take this time to relax, let the excitement cool a little, and let the sweet reality (that I don't have to squeeze with foreign 'talents' on the trains, suffer the wrath of the unforgiving weather, and dredge through the monotony of life) sink in just abit more. :D

Woohoo! End the post with a cam-whore pic :P

Thanks for all the well wishes! I'm already starting to miss everyone... My bed which I've been sleeping on for 12 years, loosening up to speak Singlish, all the familiar faces, the mundane routine, and uhhh... LAKSA! I've been spamming that for the past 2 weeks despite my tummy problems lol. Okay take care, guys. I'll try my best to update my blog regularly! :)

My last hurrah before my SEP! :)

2010-03-08T01:36:00.002+08:00

I did it. I conquered my fears and inadequacy and gave my newest performance, Wherever You Will Go by The Calling, my best shot.

The devil put out all stops to stop me dead in my tracks. I abruptly woke up to a sharp stomach pain and had bouts of diarrhea. I was so nervous that I kept getting my lyrics jumbled up right up till the actual performance.

But God is faithful and He takes over when I took the step of faith and held the mic with my hands on stage. I summoned up my stage persona, forgot all about the shy and awkward Benedict, and took it away with my voice.

I didn't want my 4 months of break to be insignificant. I didn't want to be like the rest who waste their holidays away partying and making merry. I'm glad I had the chance to work a part-time job stint to boost my resume. It was satisfying yet still gave me an unfulfilled feeling.

To a veteran performer, it means nothing to them. But for me, it means alot. To the FITS organizers, thanks for giving me a chance to perform. Also, thanks to all backstage/F&B crew, stylists, models, performers and attendees for making this event a success! I've thoroughly enjoyed myself and this will definitely serve as a launching platform for grander dreams to be achieved in the near future. Rock on, guys! :)

Music is my life

2010-02-15T23:19:00.005+08:00

I reckon everyone would be blogging about their CNY experiences, so I decided to take a different approach with this blog post. By the way, thank you to all who have comforted me when I was feeling lousy last week. :D

Everyone in my CG is enthusiastically hyped up about the "Fashion in the Sky" event. The girls have put in so much effort, and I really pray that it'll be a success. I've been roped in by Royston as a performer, and I intend to contribute as best as I can to the maximum of my abilities! :)

I just don't know what to sing though... The songs I've been listening recently are R&B and dance numbers which I definitely can't pull off. And for a fashion event, R&B and rock are the more suitable genres, and I'm not too good at rock either. I guess I'm more well known for singing emo love ballads *lol*. :P

If anybody has suggestions, do give me a heads up. Let me introduce the songs from my playlist for 2010 thus far...

Oh gosh... I hate Korean boybands (except for Tohoshinki) but I just can't get this tune out of my head. And for a dance retard like me, I actually learnt the chorus and tutting (the Indian/Egyptian-like dance) segments. (=.=) Search up "Sorry Sorry Misheard Lyrics" on Youtube for some nasty English 'translation' (on purpose).

Japanese R&B/Soul at its best. Watching J-doramas introduces me to alot of good Japanese songs. If you think Jay Chou's MVs are over the top, watch this and you'll have a second opinion *rofl*.

The perfect romantic love ballad to sing to your lover. Too bad Japanese girls can't understand Chinese though... HAHA, I'm not implying anything... :P

How did I totally missed out on this awesome song for more than a year!? Within minutes of listening to this great track from Craig David, it made its way to the top of my playlist.

Westlife's albums have been flops since their peak in the early 21st century with radio hits such as "Flying Without Wings". Having lost faith in the iconic boyband for years, this album renewed my faith in their musical talents. They're pretty much still using the same formula but at least the songs are more credible enough to be chart-breakers.

Hope you enjoyed listening to those songs, and I hope that I've helped you revamp your playlist a little. (^-^)

Family woes...

2010-02-11T20:09:00.004+08:00

Humans, by nature, subconsciously and consistently compare oneself to another. Let's bring it down to something more specific - family. My friends often openly voice their envy for me because I have a good family. Well, at least, on the outward...

My financial life has been stable ever since when I was young. Probably cos' my parents are thrifty and the value of thrift has been inculcated in me. Also, I've been granted freedom when I proved my independence in NS. For those reasons, many friends envy me.

Yet, no one family is perfect. I envy KC for having such a warm and friendly mum who would try her utmost best to relate to her sons. I envy Debbie for having such a close-knitted family who would go on outings together regularly. I envy Jonathan Tan for having such supportive parents who would even go the extra mile to support his graduate studies in Japan if he were to pursue a Masters!

When I told my parents that I intend to fly and return from Tokyo, they just snapped at me (cos' I would incur transport fees to get to and fro Fukuoka). Which is about $300 but I can also finance that myself. My mum yelled "WHY MUST YOU GO TO TOKYO SO MANY TIMES? YOU WENT BEFORE SO MANY TIMES ALREADY AND THERE'S NOTHING THERE". And the occasional "SIAO AH". My father became irritatingly inquisitive. "You go there do what? Got friend ah? Go so many times already" x10 (you get the idea).

My parents have been penny pinchers all their lives. I shouldn't have been so surprised at their reactions. When I grudgingly muttered "aiya don't go, don't go la" to my dad, he just went back to his room and watched his TV. Does the man even understand his son? Not even 10%?

My family pretty much lead our own individual lives, esp. my bro and I. Alot of my church friends wonder why I didn't pick up guitar skills from my brother. It's simply cos' we don't have that close of a relationship.

My parents occasionally reminisce about the past and grumble a little about their parents. How my grandfather never gave my dad attention. How my grandmother had been ruling the house with an iron fist. Ironically, the ills in my family line have persisted another generation.

We take after our parents the most because we have their DNA. No matter how you resist, your parents' characteristics would manifest within you. Which is why I'm thankful that I have God by my side so that He might guide me in wisdom. If you're reading, keep this in mind. It might just come in useful if you plan to marry and have kids within the next few years. :)

I don't wish to go on further cos' no matter what, they will always be my parents and I should honour and respect them. So, after reading this post, do you still envy me? Wendy, you're not alone. Let's jiayou together. :)

Reality vs Dreams

2010-02-07T01:15:00.002+08:00

I've not heard about Rev. Paul Scanlon throughout my 6 years of Christianity so I wasn't expecting much from today's service, thus I was genuinely pleasantly surprised by his charisma and wit! He also spoke of a message which is so real and applicable to our lives, and I am deeply impacted by his words.

"Kissing the frogs before we meet our 'prince'". Yeah, living in a real world, survival is of utmost importance. Never be a spiritual loony who prays mindlessly daily for manna to drop from the heavens. God listens to our prayers, but we must do something physically concrete so that He can move through our actions.

It could never be more timely than this cos' I just started work as a data entry clerk, and the job requires me to perform mundane tasks. I'm earning less than some of my female peers who are younger and have lesser qualifications. A typical Singaporean male's ego would never accept it, but I did (cos' I'm no typical Singaporean :P). It's nothing fantastic but at least I can have the means to pledge for the upcoming Arise and Build, so I thank God for the opportunity, no matter how small it is.

"The rejection I face can be my new direction". I started making a stand for my own beliefs 2 years ago, and not surprisingly, I've ran into criticism and ridicule. I began to see things in a clearer light. The flaws of the Singaporean society, the ill trends within the youth circle, or just simply the vicious cycle of life. Some people may think I'm a sadist who loves making an ass of people for nothing, but being critical is my way of moving forward in life.

I've been a simple nice guy for 20 over years and it brought me nowhere. It's only when I stepped out of the shell before I could see the vision for my life. I reckon the rejection would only escalate, and it'll push me to the direction which I yearn for, which is to live a life away from Singapore in Japan.

Alot of people who don't know me well think that I'm a naive, ignorant fool who blindly loves Japan. But truth is, I've taken courses which educates me about the harsh reality of Japan, and I know the situation clearer than anyone. Then again, as Rev. Paul Scanlon said, the challenges at every stage of our lives are meant to be conquered.

Don't belittle yourself because what others say about you. Pursue your dreams with confidence.

In a deep dilemma...

2010-01-25T00:10:00.007+08:00

I'm dipping into a state of listlessness... No success in getting a part-time job, everybody's studying hard in school and I'm doing practically nothing, migraine treatment in the hospital tentatively put on hold for another 5 more weeks but still gives me a sense of impending doom, and after drafting up travel plans for a few days, my potential travel partner told me that he cannot take leave from his work. Sighhh... =(

You might ask me, why give myself unnecessary stress? I should just go to Japan by the official date scheduled for me. Well, I simply feel that I should take this opportunity to relax and take a breather by my own. Then, on the other hand, I don't know why I'm so afraid to take a bold step to travel independently. Is it the inconveniences which I would encounter as a sole traveler? Or am I lacking confidence in my Japanese and socializing skills?

Mehhh... I'm utterly confused... I hope my admission package will come soon, so that I can get a little busier settling my visa and linking my bank account. I have to do something constructive before I can truly feel the excitement of traveling abroad for the first time as a student.

The famous "Three Sights of Japan". Marvelously beautiful scenic spots where you can spend a little bit more time to absorb and appreciate centuries of tradition and culture. These are places where having friends might actually be a hindrance if you want to take things at your own pace.

I gotta weigh all my options... Emailing every single Japanese friend whom I know. Meeting a few familiar faces every few days within my journey should dispel feelings of loneliness. I'm hoping it'll really become a reality... I hate that "so near yet so far" kinda feeling. (>.<)

What are your 'real clothes'?

2010-01-15T23:12:00.007+08:00

Thanks to Jon Tan, a few of our CG peeps had the privilege of attending a high profile fashion event at Tangs Plaza! It's my first time attending such events and honestly, it's not really my kind of thing but nevertheless, it was a great experience.

A nice photo commemoration of our impromptu gathering, courtesy of Tangs photo-taking services! =P

I kinda feel out of place tho', cos' most of the attendees were dressed to the nines, and I dressed quite casually (partly also cos' I didn't have a chance to change into something better since the gathering was decided when I was busy in school). As the gorgeous and hunky models paraded past us, I couldn't help but feel a tinge of envy but I remembered...

...watching this drama

Entitled "Real Clothes", it touches on the issue on how fashion can change our lives and its importance and relevance in developing our self-esteem and exuding our unique personalities.

In society today, most people belong to 2 categories, nonchalant people who neglects fashion and disregards it, and arrogant people who wants to show off their superiority through fashion. Thankfully, most of my friends aren't like that. =P

Yet, this drama reminds us that although fashion aids us in discovering our self-identity, the core of our hearts is still the utmost important trigger. Through our own personality defined through the years, we develop our own unique fashion sense. Not the other way round! Fashion is merely a tool for you to express your individuality without the need for words.

I find it amazing how J-doramas always depict and emphasize a moral value at the end of it all. The plot may be running thin cos' the typical Japanese drama has only 11 episodes, but the simple messages of morals are almost always enough to impact the viewers.

Much more meaningful than the typical soapy romantic Korean drama which can NEVER happen in real life (I'm guilty of watching Princess Hours and BoF tho' =X), and slapstick cringe-worthy Taiwanese idol dramas which provide nothing but pure brainless entertainment.

No offence to peeps who like those dramas lol. =P I don't mean to generalize but most are like that, agreed? If you're feeling a little angry or guilty, then perhaps you should reflect on how you spend your time on leisure. =D Even leisure can play a part in molding us. Every moment in life is precious, and to quote Kris Allen's song "we gotta live like we're dying". =)

Sooo... back to topic, even if I didn't stand out in the crowd, I should still feel proud of myself cos' I'm pursuing my own unique fashion sense instead of following a trend or fitting myself into a standard mold. Yeah, the other attendees look glamorous and all, but they look the same. Cast envy aside and be your own unique you today! (^-^)

The irony of life...

2010-01-11T00:38:00.002+08:00

It's almost mid January and I've still not found a job yet! Life is feeling pretty aimless and empty for now. Although I'm looking forward to my SEP in April, I wouldn't want to waste my time for these 3 months... I've sent in internship applications to 4-5 companies. I deposited my resume in a few recruitment agency websites. My mum is assisting me through her contacts. Yet, nothing at all till now... =(

Life can be ironic, huh? My resolution is burning stronger than ever, to make my life on earth meaningful, and yet I'm having so much difficulty finding a job whereas my friends around me seem to get jobs so easily. Same with my health. Everyone is saying exercise is good for me, to stave my illnesses and keep fit, yet exercise is the one biggest thing which will aggravate my migraine and IBS. Sigh... What should I do?

The apparent irony arises from the influence of the devil. Whenever I want to accomplish something great for God, something ALWAYS seem to hinder my path. Should I wait until I'm matured enough to wholly rely on God's voice, but risk losing the window of opportunity? Or should I trust God wholeheartedly despite my circumstances and take a step of faith?

I'm scheduling a career consultation with Kelly Services consultants in NUS on Thursday, so I'm hoping something fruitful will come out of it. In the meantime, I guess I'll just head to school and scout the modules which I'll be taking in future semesters.

2 1/2 more months before the excitement kicks in...

It's a brand new year!~

2010-01-05T12:22:00.003+08:00

Haha, I kena tekan by Val for not blogging over the new year, so here I am! =)

Coming up with new year resolutions is good, but I feel it has become cliched and its meaning has been eroded by the sands of time. Everyone is all fired up and enthusiastic as the clock struck midnight to usher in 2010.

The next day, everyone is furiously scribbling in their notebooks of the things they wish to accomplish this year. Funny thing is most of them fizzle out as they are forced to engage the harsh reality of life after all the X'mas and new year festivities. What's the point then?

Outwardly, I appear slack and unmotivated but pure confidence and convictions need not be proudly displayed. I know strongly what I want in life and I don't need a certain time of the year to reiterate my beliefs. For me, new year resolutions has no meaning because what I'm after, it has become my LIFE's resolution.

No offence to all who did your goals and resolutions though. =P Provided you weren't just latching onto a trend but treat your goals seriously. By hook or by crook, those goals must be achieved. That's the kind of conviction you would need to stay true to what you've planned for yourself for 2010.

Of course, there are some matters which I've neglected, yet I know they're important. Perhaps, I should do a little reflection on those matters which I've neglected. =P

1) Get rid of my nagging migraines

An action plan is already drawn up for me by my neurologist. I may need to check in to hospital for 3 days in 1-2 weeks time for an intensive treatment. Dear E441 brothers and sisters, I'll need your spiritual support in this.

2) Get off my lazy bum and exercise more regularly

Too used to sleeping till 10-11 AM which by then, I'll blame the scorching hot sun and decide not to step out of my house for exercise. Ahhh, gotta change this bad habit. I'll start off gradually by doing some static exercises at home until I feel more conditioned so that I'll be more willing to do further strenuous exercises.

3) Strengthen my spiritual core muscles

I really need to spend more time with God. I need to build up myself spiritually cos' I'll be away from CHC and E441 for 4-5 months and I'll be inevitably subjected to temptations in Japan.

Slightly less than 3 months before my SEP commences... I really can't wait! As for these 3 months, I pray that God provides the opportunity for me to do something productive. Lazing around at home feels good for awhile but not in the long haul. =S

Happy new year and may all your dreams come true this year! (^-^)

A little late but... MERRY X'MAS! (^_^)

2009-12-26T14:50:00.017+08:00

The week leading up to X'mas was a great time of basking in the festivities, having fun caroling and celebrating with my dearest E441 friends, and of cos', honoring the birthday boy, our Lord Jesus Christ. =)

First up was the candlelight service...

Elicia always look so cheerful! Haha =D

E441, what a great CG! =)

Caroling was a blast! =P

With the beautiful sisters of DT Zone! (^-^)

The handsome men of DT Zone! (Ops bhb =X)

A happy group photo to signify the success of our caroling efforts! =D

Cosy little fellowship awaiting countdown for X'mas after X'mas eve service =)

I bumped into Sean with his Japanese girlfriend and her sister. Finally got acquainted to a Japanese girl of my age! So far, in all the Japanese fellowship occasions, either they're kids or married couples. I told my CG girls about it and they were teasing me non-stop about it. (>.<) That was a bad move *rofl*!

But I really wonder how Sean pulled it off. To even get a Japanese girl to fancy a Singaporean guy (assuming you're average-looking like me. Hunks are desirable any part of the world, no matter the color of your skin lol) would be quite a feat. To date a Japanese girl who is a air stewardess (who has the luxury of choice of men from all over the world) is even more unimaginable.

And to have her take the initiative chasing after the guy? WOAHHH!!! Sean's one lucky bloke... No, luck shouldn't be a factor as Christian. It's gotta be his spiritual maturity which attracted the girl. There's just no other explanation *lol*. I'll leave it up to God if I would have future opportunities to know the sister better. =P

Alright, enough with the day-dreaming HAHA! Merry X'mas everyone and I'm sure everyone's looking forward to the New Year! May 2010 be a blessed year for all! =)

Crossroads...

2009-12-14T01:08:00.002+08:00

For the first time in my tertiary tenure, I was actually excited to attend a optional talk and *gasp* during my holidays! It was a graduate studies talk by Keio Media Design, and for 2 hours, I was allured into an ideal world of upgrading my personal worth whilst pursuing my passion in the land where I love the most, Japan.

The crossroads in my life are approaching faster than I had expected. If I choose to throw aside everything comfortable in Singapore and walk through this door, 2011 will be the last year I'd spend in Singapore. After 2 years of graduate studies, if any good job opportunities spring up in Japan, I'd most likely stay put.

Pastor Kong's sermon on Sat convicted my heart cos' I was expecting the best situation out of the possibilities. I was asking the Keio professors if I'd be granted concurrent internship programs during my studies so that I can 'offset' the opportunity costs derived from spending 2 more years studying instead of working. QL-senpai spoke straight to me bluntly that "I was just too greedy", and yes I agree so...

Pastor's right. I have to walk through the door with faith. I can't expect God to show me the future blessings in stored for me so that I'd feel motivated to step up. Even if at the end of it all where there may possibly be no tangible rewards, ultimately it's a test of faith which God will be judging me with.

Kenneth was discussing about this with me on our way back home after service. Do I have the tenacity to follow after Abraham's shoes? Leaving my family and friends. Leaving my comfortable lifestyle. And yet, I know I won't be happy if I bow down to conformity and accept the 'Singapore Plan' for my life.

The crossroads are fast approaching... I shall make use of my upcoming SEP to evaluate where I stand. Am I matured enough? Am I independent enough? Is my faith strong enough? Unless a super good offer comes my way after graduation where I can still pursue my passion and interest i.e. Koei, I will need to make this life-altering decision less than 2 years from now.

Until then, I shall take my time to relax for this holidays. Caroling is coming up and it's kinda like a consolation for us peeps who aren't travelling overseas. Haha!

I've never spoken Japanese this much until now =P

2009-12-06T22:50:00.005+08:00

Despite the nagging migraines bothering me incessantly, I felt very blessed for everything which went down this past week! I'm beginning to receive favor and opportunities for my calling, as I was given the honour to play host to a Japanese Christian delegate, Tatsuya Shimomura-san, for the duration of his vacation in Singapore.

Somehow, foreigners have the impression that us Singaporeans know the tourist attractions inside-out. I was sooo ashamed to tell him that it's my first time in a long while that I'm heading to Sentosa for sightseeing. I don't even know the way to the Merlion. =S But thankfully, the overhaul in the island's infrastructure made it easy for me to assume the role of a tour guide.

I'm very blessed by this young man for his spiritual hunger. He literally bombarded me with spiritual questions, and thankfully, his Japanese friend was with us, so I did not need to rack my brain too hard to translate my reply into Japanese. =P Despite the language barrier, he was still enthusiastic to join my CG's thanksgiving event. Truly a strong-willed worker for the Lord!

Shimo-san, the always lovely and bubbly Elicia, and me =)

Pastor Kong mentioned before that he was weary when he preached the gospel in Japan to an ungrateful crowd, but as he obeyed God, his message unknowingly impacted the originator of the largest revival in Japan. Which is why I wanted to invest in Shimo-san's life, although at the moment, it seems like he's quite powerless to change anything in Japan. I believe his raw faith will see him through the storms which he would be inevitably facing when he returns home.

If you're wondering where I went on Sunday, I availed myself to attend the Japanese fellowship at Janet's birthday place, the SAF Yacht Club. Not sure if that was a sound decision cos' Jasmine and I were feeling utterly AWKWARD *lol*. Didn't manage to make any new Japanese friends, although I did catch up with a few acquaintances.

At least in a smaller setting, both parties are 'forced' to interact with each other, as how Shimo-san and I interacted on Friday. It's natural human instinct to fall back into familiar territory if it's available. So, the Japanese were talking amongst themselves, and Jasmine and I were standing by a corner.

Awww shucks... I thought I was getting a hang of things, ever since I took the bold step to engage the Japanese culture actively, thus it came as a rude realization that I'm still far from maturity in handling different situations. I shan't give up tho'! I'm gonna keep trying and learning! (^-^)

Thanks to all my dear CG mates who showed great hospitality to Shimo-san! He was very blessed by our CG, and he wants to bring back our open and fun CG culture back to his CG in Japan! Kudos to all of you! Christianity truly has no boundaries! =)

It is... FINISHED!

2009-11-29T00:13:00.007+08:00

Yeah! Exams are finally over... My other peers are sooo envious of me cos' most of them end their exams around 1-3 Dec. Heh, after 2+ years of uni life, at long last, I can experience the feeling of enjoying my freedom whilst my peers are still mugging like mad. I was at their end of the deal for the past 2 years. =P

Despite (yet another) hiccup in CG matters, us brothers had a great time fellowshipping at JP! Recommended my personal hairstylist at Storm Monsoon to KC (Check out his new hairstyle soon!), and courtesy of WL's and KC's GV vouchers, we went to watch Ninja Assassin. Thanks WL, we owe you one. =) Catch up after your exams, yeah? =D

Wooo... It's uber gory... Limbs and bodies flying everywhere... The 1st action sequence abruptly introduced us to a half-decapitated head and my LJS' grilled fish dinner almost came out of my mouth. Eughhh... Gross... (>.<)

My new mantra in life for the past year has been "change is the only constant in life" and yesterday, I did something new once more. I went out with my Japanese sensei and classmates for the first time, and even sang Japanese KTV! Finally, I had a chance to flaunt what I've been practising at home HAHA!

Singing in Japanese is so challenging... It's not just about vocal capabilities anymore... My sensei was laughing at one of my classmates who always have a perpetual problem reading Japanese words, as he was murmuring and stuttering his way through the songs LOL! (^-^)

Church service was great today! Pastor preached about dreams and spurred us to keep fighting for our destiny. When it came to the faith offering, I was hesitant to put in a sacrificial amount but in the end, I yielded myself to God's will. I'm glad I did that cos' God began to work in my life ALMOST IMMEDIATELY!

I wrote "my dream is to work in Japan for a renowned digital gaming company, as well as commit myself to the unchurched Japanese and render my humble assistance in any budding ministry". As I was watching the movie, a SMS came from the CHC Japanese coordinator and she specially requested for my help to play host to a visiting Japanese Christian this upcoming week. Wow, God really moves! =D

It seems far-fetched... Getting a spiritual Japanese wife, migrating to Japan, working in a renowned company relevant for my skills, and playing an active role in their small (but strong) ministry. Haha, I've been boasting about my dreams to my friends alot and I'm so afraid if it doesn't come to pass. But that's where my faith in God comes in. I'm gonna just keep believing. =)

Now, if only I get replies for my internship applications... I intend to use these 4 months to build up my resume in preparation for my post-graduation job-seeking efforts. Wage issues are of no concern to me since I'm financially secured (tho' I bled $2k+ for my new laptop =.=). Please let me know if you guys have any lobangs! (^-^)

Alright, time to head to bed! The upcoming week will be pretty exciting!

Exams are coming... REAL SOON!

2009-11-22T01:57:00.005+08:00

(It seems like my blog traffic is diminishing after all the tensions lately, but heck, I'll just update my blog cos' I'll never know when another great dude like Jonathan Tan comes along by chance =P)

Despite exams drawing near, I've been distracted checking out the best laptop bargains around, and SERIOUSLY 'disturbed' (lol) when my uni friend brought his spanking new L4D2 to school which tempted me sooo much...

Veryyy soon... Just wait for me...

Thankfully, SITEX is held after my exams, so I'll have a peace of mind while shopping for a brand new laptop. =) It's not just for gaming, since I'll need to take intensive graphics programming modules in the near future. Hmmm... Haha, okay, that was an excuse. =P

And silly me forgot to upload the photo taken during the unexpected outing I had with Jonathan Tan (and his bubbly friend, Serene)!

Inside ION's gigantic X'mas tree =)

I've weathered several storms in 2009 but it's not all dark and gloomy afterall! God is gradually moving me into my destiny, as I recently become acquainted with Jasmine and Jonathan Tan who share a passion in Japan as I do. Our paths will surely cross someday for good if we continue to love the Japanese people with the love of God! =D

Besides that, I'm glad that despite suffering heart-wrenching conflicts, my friendships with Kristal and KC have emerged stronger than before! I'm also appreciating the revival of a long-lost friendship between Kenneth and I. Not many people can accept his way of thinking, and I know people will look at me differently as I associate myself with him. But friendships aren't just based on popularity contests, and I appreciate him the way he is, so I shan't be bothered about criticisms anymore.

Seems like I've got a weird affinity with people with names starting with 'J' or 'K'. Haha... Of cos' not forgeting the 'V's (you guys know who you are! =D)

Alright, time to rest up for the FINAL day of revision on Sunday. Please pray for me, guys. I'm utterly worn out... Val was commenting how tired I looked in service today, haha! I'll get back my strength on 24th November! =P

The madness is over...

2009-11-17T00:14:00.004+08:00

Somehow, I managed to survive the madness of camping in school for 26 hours straight... And it's not just the usual project meeting in comfortable study areas with air-con. I had to bear with the scorching sun when I shot the outdoor scenes for my filming assignment. I'm red like a lobster and the sunburn patches sting like crazy. ARGHHH!!! (>.<)

I've become a little complacent recently cos' I thought I had the luxury of time to spare since I only have 2 exams coming up. Then, I realized... there's only 4 solid days for studying left, and I'm lagging so badly in my revision. Gosh, I've to start up my engine in full force again!

Recently, I had some time to destress a little, and out of boredom, I went to TS, scouting for a nice Japanese drama series for entertainment during study breaks. I had the choice of a typical corny romance or the wacky detective theme (which I absolutely love, if I don't wish to exercise my brain too much :P), but in the end, I chose...

Entitled "LIFE", it's a 2007 high school drama. Nope, it's not the usual high school drama which gives you a 'feel-good' feeling which makes you reminisce the adolescent naive childhood days, but it delves into the dark side of human relationships, as young as high-schoolers.

Taboo topics are the main focus here, especially bullying. It's not just any childish name-calling, but it is SERIOUS bullying (more than often not, it involves violence and psychological manipulation). The drama makes you think about life deeper in detail as it deals with issues such as jealousy, peer pressure, conformity etc.

However, beyond all these, the drama speaks of true friendship, standing up for your beliefs (despite getting shunned by people around you), emerging stronger from adversity. It's depressing to sit through the first few episodes cos' the drama depicts suicide, rape, bullying. But thankfully, the message picks up after Episode 4, where the protagonist makes a firm decision to resist as she forges genuine friendships with new comrades.

2009 has been a year of trials and tribulations for me. The outcomes may not have been desirable, but I pray at the end of it all, I can proudly say I've come out wiser and stronger than before. There's no room for regrets. Not cos' I'm full of ego to say that I've done right, but just for the simple reason that we, as humans especially Christians, have to be forward-looking. 2010 is a year which will propel me into my destiny and I'm not gonna let anyone or anything hinder my progress.

It's amazing how a simple J-dorama can speak into my heart, huh? If anybody wishes to borrow it, I'll be willing. =)

I'm gonna be so broke soon cos' I have a BURNING DESIRE to buy a new laptop and mobile phone. =S

The end of semester... A new beginning for my life

2009-11-09T00:10:00.003+08:00

Everyone, and I mean EVERYONE, is crazy about the Mcdonald's & Monopoly gimmick going on now. Just a few days ago, my friends and I went to Mcdonald's when midnight was closing in, and it was still friggin' crowded. It's amazing how easily Singaporeans are suckered into trends, but well at least, it breaks the monotony of the Singaporean life. We have a brand new topic to talk about, albeit a superficial one. "I JUST GOT MARINA BAY. YOU GOT SENTOSA COVE!?"

'Instant' wins aren't exactly free stuff if you consider how overpriced fastfood is. Now that they're offering 'free' stuff, it shows how confident they are in their product. No matter what, we'll always be at the losing end. Do you find yourself eating Mcdonald's more regularly recently? To gamble for a chance to get that coveted Sentosa Cove? That's precisely what they are luring you to do.

Mehhh... The prizes are indeed enticing... But as an informed student who is learning about media effects on society, I have to resist it... A vacation to Hawaii would turn my upcoming holidays around from degrading into pure boredom...

Back to my personal life, this past week has been a mentally strenuous time of confrontation and I have to take a hiatus for 2 weeks to take my mind off such matters to fully concentrate on my upcoming exams. If I play my cards right, this semester might just be a breakthrough in my university tenure thus far. I can't afford to be distracted at this crucial point of time...

My efforts aren't appreciated and I'm feeling so lousy now. In retrospect, it makes me question myself if I did the right thing, or at least, approached the problem at the right angle. Then again, God reminded me that I shouldn't be a man-pleaser but a God-pleaser. Whatever God prompts me to do, I'll do it. Despite knowing that I'll draw flak from people around me, even close friends. I'm glad KC seized the opportunity to pursue his education once more. At least that's one sign of the fruits of my labour...

All the best to my fellow comrades in university for the upcoming final exams! =)

Just a little while more to go...

2009-11-03T23:19:00.002+08:00

Ack too much conflict for these past few days, I'm getting worn out by all the tension... LOL! But I'm glad I can step aside for now cos' Kenneth and Janet are finally gonna thrash things out tomorrow. So, I shall leave it to them to settle their personal conflict. Hopefully, the outcome would be desirable... =) And yes, Debbie, you're my best gal-pal thus far, of cos' I can talk to you on a more intimate level as well. Sorry for not including you! =P

I've spent so much time and effort worrying about my friends, and I'm afraid I'll have to be selfish till the end of Nov as I rush through my final assignments and revision for my exams. But I'm pleasantly surprised that I'm not as angsty as I was last semester. Internal disputes within project groups where the members are some of my closer friends in NUS + Piling assignment deadlines = one angsty, emo Benedict. =P

A huge burden has been lifted off my chest today cos' I completed my presentation (together with the report, the project is a hefty 50% of the module). I tried to be adventurous and improvise outside of my script and I HAD A FREAKIN' MENTAL BLOCK! =S I was stumped for 5-7 secs as I glanced sheepishly at my lecturer as he gave me a little nod of encouragement.

I seriously have no clue why my mind isn't as nimble as before. My intelligence is still intact cos' I can churn out elaborate essays, but I just can't think on the spot for nuts! Together with my worsening problem of poor enunciation of my spoken words, I'm fearing that the migraine which has been plaguing me for over 2 years is something much more. Perhaps I'm just scaring myself... Perhaps it's a spiritual warfare I have to go through to emerge stronger...

But I guess it's no point worrying about things which I have no control over. No matter what, I'll move on my life's journey bravely with the grace of God. And thank God that I just received an email from my computing tutor who rectified a bug in my program and half of the burden I have for my final computing assignment which is due this Sunday is gone. =)

Ohhh... And I just checked my gradebook for my last assignment... I've gotten an A- for my previous assignment! =D We had to create a 3D world and I was feeling superbly inferior cos' I was using predefined shapes in the software database, whereas the crazy foreigners are giving 3D games (think in terms of at least Counter-Strike quality graphics) a run for their money. I'm sooo fortunate to have a great lecturer and tutors who consider effort as a grading criteria as well. =D

If God is for me, who can be against me!? I shall hold on to this promise and dash towards the finishing line... on 23rd Nov. It's coming... (^-^)

Hmmm...

2009-11-02T01:21:00.004+08:00

Sigh... It has come to my attention that my comments on my blog and emails don't sit well with a few people. At least I've learnt something new - I can't expect people to heed my advice if my relationship with them aren't close enough. Possibly the only person who is open for me to speak into his life is KC, my newfound brudder on FB who is my best friend of 15 years and running. I shall work on building these relationships better before speaking into these people's lives once more...

I've been accused of being cowardly, but aren't the true cowards the ones who know the presence of a problem and choose to casually ignore it, in order to maintain status quo? True, it seems that I'm having an easy time talking jack on my blog. And I choose not to mention names cos' as I've said, my relationships with other people aren't as strong as with KC, but it's not that I'm cowardly and try to beat around the bush.

If anybody is willing to listen to my counsel, do let me know and I promise you I won't hold back. I had received an angry email just a few weeks ago regarding my comments and the person questioned my intentions. But if such people think through carefully, why would I be so boliao to attract unnecessary flak, when I could have been just another typical nice Christian who stays low-profile and live life peacefully? Am I really so kaypoh, or am I itching to get into some trouble for nothing?

I made it clear from the start when I first made this blog. I'm not gonna be just another feel-good blog, typing about "my sumptuous McGriddles breakfast I have with my girlfriend" and other superficial stuff about myself. My life is pretty boring, so how do I wish to compare with other more 'interesting' blogs? Just a small dose of cleavage from a bimbotic busty model earns a thousand times more hits than my blog.

But of cos' that's not the point of me typing on this blog. Since I have a regular readership among some of my friends, why not I post something that might help them along in life? But of cos' I won't be targeting anyone in particular but also broaden my stance so that random people who stumble upon my blog can benefit can well. That's how I got to know Jonathan Lexington Tan who appreciated my thought life. So, I hope from now on, no one takes what I say personally.

The sin of omission is far more serious than the sin of commission. At least sins of commission are tangible problems we know we can work on. What's so dangerous about sin of omission is that you might not even perceive it as a problem! But when it gets out of hand, it might be irreparable. Pastor Kong frequently preached "When you meet God in Heaven, He's not gonna ask you how many millions you made, what a good family man you are. He's gonna question you "why did you not reach out to that friend?", "why did you not prevent that conflict?"."

Similarly to what Zoe has preached in CGM before, are we gonna build our relationships on superficial fun and laughter, or even the obligatory consolation when our friends need emotional support? No, at the expense of straining friendships, I'm gonna keep doing what I think is right. As I stay accountable to God, I pray He would protect these friendships.

But if I have sleepless nights cos' I'm burdened with your problems, trying my best to speak into your life through my blog and emails, you should be glad instead cos' this is a privilege which I give exclusively to friends who matter to me. I can't even be bothered with hi-bye acquaintances or superficial friends. They can wallow in self-pity for all I care. =P

On a positive note, I thank God for strengthening my relationships in the CG further. Previously, Elicia and I had a 'non-existent' friendship (a term which Valerie used for our prior friendship lol =P) but after fellowship through this week's CG and service, I feel there's a greater tangiblity to our friendship. =) Adeline too... Kinda lost 'connection' with her since late '07 but recently, we can resume chatting comfortably again. And for a previously shy guy who felt awkward around females, I met Vannessa, Wendy and Pei En for dinner before CGM. Haha, it was great fellowshipping with you girls! =D

Yet another long and boring post... And I hope no one takes offence in whatever I said in this post too... I don't like to impose my views on other people. If you feel something after reading this post, that means my message ministers to you but I reiterate that I'm not targeting specific individuals. It's entirely up to you to think through what I've said or treat it as trash. I just hope to help people who are open to different perspectives. =)

It's the final lap...

2009-10-28T00:30:00.002+08:00

And... Things are starting to heat up... Last 3 weeks before the end of this semester. People say "time flies when you're having fun", I say "time flies when you're busy with assignments"! Having said that, in retrospect, this semester has been fairly peaceful. I remember around this time last semester, I was emo-ing regarding conflicts with my friends over a stupid project. In fact, I felt I've gained so much and I thank God for His protection and wisdom. I shall be more specific with examples when I officially wrap up this school term. =)

Just past Monday, a few of E441 brothers had a great time fellowshipping at West Mall as we had a mini celebration for Francis' upcoming birthday. I'm glad the brotherhood is strengthening up, but I also sincerely wish that the rifts in our CG would be mended. If we're wondering why growth doesn't come despite having some of the most happening people in our CG, that's the reason why...

I wish I can return to being the 15 year old naive, happy-go-lucky teenager who only cares about playing basketball and CS with his kakis without a worry. Now, I'm beginning to see the subtle flaws in processes, people, society surfacing, and I'm so dissatisfied with life cos' I feel that life could be much more if everyone just opens their eyes a little bigger to see the truth.

If we perceive ourselves to be the centre of the universe, we can only see so much without our field of vision. We can always take effort to change our stance to see things 'behind' us but that would take some effort. But as we begin to position ourselves further, the clearer depiction of the whole picture comes into focus with greater ease.

Oh well, why do I bother so much if I'm planning on living a life beyond Singapore? But as a friend said to me "then why are you born in Singapore!?". Yeah, I guess that's true too, so I have to stay positive and make use of my time here in Singapore.

Geez... I'm getting carried away... Alright, I have a long day to go tomorrow, so I guess I'll head to dreamland now. Thanks for reading my boring post and ciao!~

I'm 23 yrs old! =P

2009-10-22T22:32:00.016+08:00

It's been a great week of birthday celebrations! (^-^) Thank you to those who took the initiative and made the difference! I'm especially surprised (and touched) by Anxian who spent weeks painstakingly doing up my birthday 'card'. KC, Kenneth, Francis who forked out beyond the CG budget to get me a nice Zara jacket. Ivan who took initiative to ask me what I would like for my present despite his busy schedule. Litus from my uni gang who organised a simple but heartwarming birthday celebration in school. Thank you guys! =D

I'm not really an outdoor person, so I would never have dreamt that I could actually go to Marina Barrage. And for the last few months, I've been to that place for say, 4-5 times? Haha... =P As I mentioned on Facebook, my head has been spinning for the past few weeks but I'm glad I went cos' that kickstarted my birthday celebrations for the week. But of cos', more importantly, I felt our CG had fun and bonded together more intimately since then!

LoL... Final Fantasy 7 *gosh*

Targetting Francis for 'extermination'...

Resistance is futile *muhahaha!!!*

Down with the Emperor!!! >:)

Preparing for the finishing blow...

LOLLL!!! (=.=)

Nice kick but...

FEEL THE WRATH OF MY MIGHTY BUSTER SWORD!

What's Janet doing there? (o.O)

I sense something bad coming my way... =S

Ewww... Smelly... (T.T)

ARGHHH!!! >:(

Nooooo... =(

Oh, and here's the photo from my fellowship with the Japanese CG last weekend. I can't wait to get to Japan... (>.<) And that's it for my 23rd birthday... 12 midnight is fast approaching and a whirlwind day of birthday wishes and celebrations must come to an end. It has been fun. Thank you guys. (^-^)

The passage of life and death

2009-10-20T00:47:00.003+08:00

Just received news today from my parents that my maternal ah-gong passed away... I thought I could handle deaths in my family well enough, cos' I've already experienced the passing of my paternal grandpa 4 years ago. But I guess it still affects me cos' it's never a good feeling to have someone close to me gone forever.

The actual funeral is held exactly on my birthday, 22nd Oct, and my mum advised me not to go cos' she's superstitious about such conflicts. Despite that, I shall pay my respects on Weds, 21st Oct, otherwise I'll be so ashamed of myself for being such an unfilial grandson.

I guess it's gonna be a lonely b'day for me cos' my parents were intending to have a b'day dinner but now they're tied up with the funeral proceedings. Even if a kindhearted friend decides to stand in the gap for me, I doubt I can genuinely enjoy...

Oh well, life's gotta go on. Death is a natural process of our fragile human life on earth. Only in eternity with God will we enjoy everlasting bliss. I realize how short life can be. I'm gonna make every moment count. For the sake of my loved ones who passed away. For the sake of my family and friends around me. And most importantly of all, for the sake of God and His kingdom. =)

By the way, thank you to all those who remember my b'day, celebrated (or will be celebrating) my b'day. I feel truly blessed. =) Good night!

I'm not joking about my testimony in CG =P

2009-10-18T13:26:00.002+08:00

Wooo... I'm feeling super nuah now... =S After weeks of arduous efforts, I finally submitted my computer graphics assignment yesterday before heading down to church service. For the first time in months, the world ceased spinning and my life comes to a standstill. I guess I can afford some time to relax... at least for now.

Anyway, if you E441 peeps was wondering where I 'disappeared' to yesterday, I went with my friend to meet a Japanese CGL to have dinner with her CG consisting of entirely Japanese people! (^_^) And for the last time... SHE'S NOT MY GF!!! (>.<) At least 3-4 people yesterday mistook us as a couple too. Do we really have the BF-GF look? LoL! =S

I wasn't feeling too well recently (migraine and IBS recurrences), so I felt that I didn't do an equally good job as the last time when I brought Japanese students around in NUS. But it was an awesome opportunity cos' coincidentally, an ojiisan is a Kyushu University graduate and his family resides in Fukuoka! I'm beginning to appreciate the divine appointments set by God. =)

A Singaporean coordinator came along and he spoke in PERFECT Japanese. Sigh... When can I ever reach that level? An even more interesting revelation was that he and the Japanese CGL are actually a married couple of 10 years! (o.O) Woah, how did he manage to find a Japanese lady who is fervent for God, speaks in Singlish, and is willing to stay in Singapore!? Goshhh... I think he's becoming my newest role model in life. I shall be his young Padawan and ask him for tips. =P

Well, on a serious note, the CGL is intending to make this an official ministry, but for now, she allows me to help out on a voluntary basis. I'm glad I'm moving forward in my true calling! =) 80% of the girls in choir are around my age, yet in the Japanese CG, either they're too young or too old *lol*. But I gotta focus on the higher calling... Higher calling... I shall heed Francis' advice to just serve God and He'll send the right girl along my way. =D (Hey Victor, all the best in finding yours haha)

Jasmine and I took some pics with some of them, and I shall post them up once she uploads it to Facebook. Time to prep-up for a time of CG fellowship at Marina Barrage! (^-^)

Getting older yet again...

2009-10-11T23:41:00.006+08:00

Wooo... My birthday is coming up again!!! (^_^) But that means I'm growing older... (>.<) Anyway, I've not cared about birthdays for a long time. For the past few years, I have just been having dinner with my family, and the obligatory celebration by the CG. No offence to birthday organizers, but it's my opinion that it feels obligatory. =P Only closer friends would make it much more personal and heartwarming, I guess... =)

I've got a few friends who asked for my gift preference if they were planning to buy a present for me. I'm not particularly glad about the idea of receiving gifts, but I'm surprised there are people who actually take effort to remember my birthday (probably thanks for Facebook). =P

I feel kinda paiseh to just tell them what I want... That's just not my style... But if they insist, I figured that it's best to tell, otherwise they'll feel as if their efforts are wasted if I don't like the gift, and I'll feel disappointed that they don't understand me well enough to know my desires.

By the way, my list of items below are not exactly birthday requests per say, but it's more of a checklist for me, before I head to Japan next year. So, some stuff might appear unreasonable for a simple birthday gift. Don't fret. =D

1) Fashionable tote bag for guys --> I'm carrying a cheapo Taiwanese spree import currently haha! I like those with a decent shiny hue, but not too blinding to the eye. That's LOUDDD (yet another blatant reference to Ris Low =P)

Something like this, I guess...?

Bordering on the edge of LOUDness, but still fine =P

2) A stylish jacket which redefines my fashion sense

Yeahhh... It's a little LOUDDD, but I think it's appropriately LOUDDD. Janet might have different opinions, but at least that's what I thought when I pictured myself wearing this. =P I've placed an order for this jacket through a spree, but nobody else is interested in the spree, and I have to wait indefinitely. =(

3) Cool accessories, esp. necklace and belt --> The right accessories spiff up a person's image by alot. Hoping that works for me as well. =P

4) Designer spectacles --> My Japanese acquaintances marvelled at my Levis spectacles. Why is that? Cos' over in Japan, Levis strictly sells jeans (BIGINI and JUSH JEANS! Oh gosh... I gotta stop this... =.=). I'm not exactly a brand-conscious guy but I'm convinced that the right use of brand does help at times.

5) Cool metallic-based watch --> My watch is almost 6 years old... I don't even bother about the scratches and tiny cracks. =P But I'm definitely going to change it before SEP. I saw a pretty cool watch sold at City Chain. It has a medieval theme to it and is copper bronze in color to reflect that nature. Slick! If only I could find some pictures of it... =S

6) User-friendly, function-rich smartphone --> I don't keep up to date with the latest happenings in the mobile world, so please enlighten me when December hits. That's when I'll probably trade in my shitty Xperia for a new phone.

And of cos'... I don't mind a teddy bear *LOL*!

AHAHAHA ROFL! =D

Oh well, I'm not expecting anything besides the usual angbao from my parents and the obligatory CG present. Please don't feel pressured to buy anything in particular. =) It would be great if I can spend this year's birthday with close friends over a simple dinner. Or maybe a hot date? Ops =X

e-Learning sucks

2009-10-08T23:55:00.003+08:00

NUS decides to play smart aleck by implementing this e-Learning week, whereby our lectures are webcast online. Rationale? In the event of a possible deterioration of the H1N1 situation, schools would be suspended indefinitely but lessons are expected to continue as usual.

Why does it suck? 1) Average students such as myself lack motivation to watch online webcast when we're lazing at home 2) Technically inapt lecturers such as my NM professor have trouble recording it properly 3) It just plain sucks. =S

Well, anyway, since I had the luxury of time, Ivan organized a basketball session with my uni gang, which includes me. I was open for the idea, but cos' everyone else had project meetings, the timing was pushed back further and further... (o.O) until a point where I decided I should just forgo it and concentrate on my revision and assignments.

Friends who don't understand me well enough think I'm dorky and boring when I reject such invitations. But... whatever. I'm a man of my own unique set of principles which I can be proud of. I'm not easily swayed. I shan't yield to society and become just another mindless drone, giving in to every social obligation. As long as I know I'm operating within God's purpose for my life, I believe I'll have the last laugh in due season. =)

On a random note, I saw my Jap-looking eye candy at Lakeside MRT again!!! (T.T) But my mum was with me (cos' she needed to take the MRT as well)... (=.=) She's really pretty, but she's got the ice queen look tho'. Really afraid she'll reject me outright if I approach her. =S Oh well, we'll see. =P

Yet another week is coming to an end... I'm truly excited for my life for 2010 cos' I'll be trying out internship and of cos' the SEP to Japan which I have been bragging about. =D Just gotta get through another few more weeks...

This post is something that screams MEEE!~

2009-10-05T23:32:00.006+08:00

Ehhh... I've ran out of ideas to blog about lol... I guess I shall just spam photos for now... That's the easiest way to run a blog, isn't it? *rofl* See most of the blogs of bimbotic SG models. Nothing but photos of them in scantily-clad outfits and they score thousands of hits. How shallow can the human mind be? =P

For you guys who remember me leaving abruptly in the middle of Victor's and Zoe's birthday celebrations at Sentosa, it was cos' I had another party to attend! Whew... And it's my dear friend, Michelle, who's always so cute and bubbly *haha*. She never fails to bring laughter to my Singtel clique! =)

After going for countless chalet parties, having one at a KTV pub is kinda refreshing *lol*

Having fun singing our lungs out! (^_^)

This past Friday, I had yet another birthday celebration for 2 of my JC clique friends, but it was more of a casual setting without the celebration as the main agenda. For some reason, the birthday boy booked a hotel room at Royal Scotts for us to stay overnight.

Ehhh, don't you think it's weird having 5-6 guys squeezing in a hotel room for no particular reason? =S But anyhow, I rquested to go back home cos' I have a project meeting on Saturday morning. What a close shave... Whew... LOL! =P

Gosh, I'm on candid camera. (>.<)

I hope to get more insights for my next post. I find that blogs can be a useful tool to convey life's principles. You might never know when you're helping a suicidal teenager, a working adult disgruntled with life, a wounded person who needs spiritual healing, through the words expressed in your blog.

Although the primary purpose of a blog is to become a personal diary for us, it doesn't always have to be something about MEEE *Ris Low's squeaky voice*. =P Singaporeans are too self-centered. We need to stop for a moment, look at the world go by, and realize we are not at the centre of the universe.

The recent graciousness campaign (Phua Chu Kang's awful rapping) is merely a media fad. Let's tread on the pathway to TRUE graciousness! =)

Birthday celebrations over the week~

2009-09-29T23:48:00.013+08:00

I'm so sorry, my brothers and sisters of E441, for not going to prayer meeting today. The spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak. I couldn't even muster an ounce of strength when my lesson was finally finished at 8 PM. I'm really getting old... I used to be able to get through 12 torturous hours of school daily during P5 & 6 (KC, the good ol' days LOL!)...

I shall do a quick update of the happenings over the 2nd half of my recess week, before heading off to lalaland...

Indulging in ice cream when I'm not supposed to eat at all... Ops =X

Well, since it's a belated birthday celebration for Weirong (the guy in the pic), I gotta oblige... Haha!

My SoC clique! (^_^)

Ehhh last Sunday, I had yet another breakthrough. I made my 'triumphant' return to Sentosa after boycotting that place for donkey years! The CG intended to celebrate Zoe's birthday so I guess... Yet another obligation? Nahhh, surprisingly, it's not that bad haha.

Francis initiated some funny poses...

Here's #2

Woots, macho or not? =D

Push-up commando-style! Jon Goh buay tahan liao LOL! =P

Shucks, what an awesome candid shot of myself (=.=)

Flashmob rehearsal with Hongxiu acting as Zoe *lol*

Awesome group shot!~

Okayyy... Lalaland beckons... BOOMS! =D

Kyushu University students visit NUS!

2009-09-24T23:48:00.002+08:00

These 2 weeks has been pretty amazing~ I did so many things for the first time in my life, and I'm feeling great for taking the first step of faith! =) As you guys know from my last post, I went out one-to-one with a female, my new Japanese-loving friend, Jasmine, to my first-ever visit to the Japanese school festival. And next up for today...

I finally joined my first JSS event after being a member for more than 2 years! I'm the infamous 'phantom' member of the club. A few of the JSS acquaintances which I made today were taken aback when I told them my nickname on the forums *lol*. "Starstruck"? =P

I was unusually enthusiastic this time round, cos' the visiting Japanese students were from Kyushu University, which I'll be going next semester! =) I figured it was a good opportunity to establish a network of friends in Fukuoka, so I wouldn't feel so lost when I'm actually there.

I was a little disappointed initially cos' there weren't especially cute girls *lol* but cos' of that, I could concentrate on making meaningful conversation with the guys. Surprisingly, I could actually speak Japanese good enough to sustain a decent conversation without frequent awkward pauses. I wasn't feeling confident but I thank God for blessing me with courage. =D

Reflecting on today's event, I feel that my world perspective has broadened significantly. Interacting with people from different cultures makes me realize how narrow-minded I am. It's about giving more than taking, on both sides. We have our cultural differences, but we lay them aside for the sake of a greater purpose.

Seriously, I would strongly encourage you guys to grab hold of any opportunity pertaining to such events. If we stay in our own comfortable cliques, we can never expand our influence in life. We talk about being history-makers and world-shakers in church, but after weekend service, we slip back into our own comfortable lives. It's ironic, really. =S

If I can afford the time, I'm definitely going for more of these events, now that I've become a much more confident person. Slowly but surely, I'm breaking away from the typical, mundane Singaporean lifestyle to prepare myself for my dream future in Japan. =)

Seiransai!~

2009-09-23T00:29:00.019+08:00

I've never met a girl one-to-one before. I've not dared to participate in any Japanese events. Thus, on Sunday, it was kinda like a breakthrough of sorts cos' I did both! I thank God for giving me courage lol. =)

For 2 years, I've heard of the school festival at the Waseda Shibuya Senior High School along West Coast road, but always couldn't seem to go because of reluctance or schoolwork. I'm glad this time round, it fell right smack at the start of my 1 week break, and I got acquainted to Jasmine who's similarly crazy about Japanese culture as I am. (^_^)

Japanese are really good at decorating stuff

Front booth manned by a few kimono-clad girls

A Japanese school festival isn't complete without a haunted house =P

Spooky~ Luckily 7th month is over lol!

A Japanese school festival isn't complete without a play as well!

The cast members look interesting, don't they? =)

It's a Pokemon Game House! I feel a little old playing games catered for young children... =S

Pokemon girls manning the booth! Man, there's so many Pokemon toys around, I feel as if I'm reliving my childhood days (^_^)

HAHA, ain't she cute? =)

Guai schoolboy...

Turned into chao ah beng ROFL! (o.O)

Taking photo with 1 kimono-clad girl...

Taking a photo with 3! =P

But my favourite photo is...
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Awww, she melted my heart the moment I saw her... =) My ideal GF type! *shy* Thankfully, Jasmine helped me ask her for me to take a photo with her. =)

Jasmine was pondering why Singapore schools don't have such festivals. I think we do have them but in my opinion, everything done the Singaporean way lacks 'soul'. Look, I'm a 23 year old guy enjoying himself immensely in a Japanese school festival organized by 15-17 year olds. I don't even feel 10% of the joy when I was 'forced' to attend those awful SAJC bazaars or events.

Well anyways, after exhausting ourselves from playing excessively (lol) at Seiransei, Jasmine and I decided to head to town for an early dinner. Seriously, this is the first time I'm having dinner with a girl alone (or maybe I did, but I forgot).

Thankfully, we built up a comfortable rapport along the way so it didn't feel as awkward as in the initial meeting. Once we start talking about Japanese stuff, we just went on and on without what Bro Darren would term as 'awkward silence'. There were quite a few instances of that, especially when Clement was spouting his usual nonsense, but hmmm, I guess everything went rather smoothly! =)

Thanks for the friendship, Jasmine! =D Your hair color is super cool!

Alright, I'm back in reality, and I just finished my 2.5k word essay, and following up, a 2k word book review, as well as the new computer graphics assignment looming over the horizon. Life is gonna get tough again... Just gotta tell myself that it's all gonna be over soon! =D

Kristal's birthday party!~

2009-09-20T09:14:00.011+08:00

Lol, I'm supposed to meet my new acquaintance from CHC at 10 AM to go down together to the Japanese school festival, but she woke up late, so I have to laze around for abit first. =S

I cried bucket loads in service yesterday. Has been a long while since I shed tears in the presence of the Lord. Indeed, I'm feeling frustrated and helpless at times, being seemingly 'unfairly' treated, whilst the world is enjoying their lives.

Despite my ailments disrupting my focus, I studied way harder than my peers, and yet during my exams, the lecturer had to use their own terminology and I couldn't comprehend (because I studied the friggin' TEXTBOOK) and did that question wrongly. Even a weaker peer in maths commented that was a giveaway question, and I couldn't help but zone out after that. Why, God, why!?

Which is why I feel convicted by Pastor Kong's message, speaking about trials having a purpose, and believing in God to show us the bigger picture in due season. I want to trust God that my illnesses are for a purpose. Likewise for my studies. I had surrendered my burdens up to him as my tears flowed down my cheeks, so now it's up to Him to lead me. =)

That's my Singtel clique! A strong ongoing 3 year long friendship. =)

The SoC fellowship! With 'special guests' Ivan and Mich from FASS. Mich always kena suan cos' she's the odd one out. =P

Kristal surrounded by handsome hunks from SoC! (LoL j/k =P)

We were called the 3 musketeers by Kristal's mum *lol*

I have an eye candy at the party. She's in one of the photos. I'll let you guess who she is *rofl*.

Yesterday, we also celebrated Jon Goh's birthday! =) It was a great time of fellowship, making fun of Ms Ris Low, teasing Jon Goh and playing charades on the MRT haha!

We took photos at some Hari Raya decorations *lol*

Great CG! Let's rock on for Jesus! =D

Okay, it's about time I should start preparing myself to meet my friend already. Blogging is a great way to kill time lol. Cya guys again soon!~

Can I rejoice in my situation?

2009-09-12T00:12:00.001+08:00

Man... I felt like uber crap today... Have you ever had days when you woke up to a splitting headache, reluctant to get out of bed, and had completely no interest to talk to anyone but preferred to keep to yourself? Well, multiply that by 365 and that is basically what I've been feeling for the past 1 year. But recently, it has gotten worse that I may not seem myself at times. Here's an apology to anyone who has been affected by my predicament...

Even though I was feeling so light-headed that I couldn't exactly concentrate during CGM earlier, Zoe spoke a message which seriously impacted my heart cos' it speaks directly to my situation. Can I rejoice in my situation? Am I relying on friends around me to offer words of consolation? But that doesn't help my situation. Am I seeking God sufficiently everyday, entrusting to Him my burdens? No, I've gotta admit I've not been faithful in doing that. I pray that this will be my turning point as I'll make effort to change my spiritual lifestyle.

Still, I have to be thankful for the little things in life which God has blessed me with. For some reason, I managed to complete my computer graphics assignment earlier than my peers this time round. Just 2 weeks ago, I was the one struggling to complete it before the deadline. Now, I'm in the position to offer them advice. By the grace of God, I managed to cope with the hectic workload which I'm burdened with. In another 1 week's time, I'll be having my recess week and I hope that it'll be a good time of rest for my weary body...

Well, I'm hoping the upcoming events will take my mind off my circumstances. Kristal's birthday party tomorrow. DT performance gig at a Blood Donation Drive. Should be going to the school festival of the Japanese school at West Coast with a new CHC acquaintance. Following which would be Michelle's birthday party. Takes the monotony off my life for just awhile. After which, I'll be going at full speed for 1 1/2 months weeks to make this semester an academic success (hopefully).

My next post should be a happy one, updating pictures which would be taken at Kristal's birthday party. Bear with me for just abit longer. =)

Tell me why am I not impressed with Singaporeans? This clip is self-explanatory LOL!

It's time for uni rants yet again!

2009-09-04T10:38:00.002+08:00

I'm sooo tired... Remember that I mentioned that I finally finished my assignment last Saturday in my last post? Well, I didn't have too much time to celebrate. A new wave of assignments beckons. (=.=) Here's a breakdown of my weekly workload.

1) 4-8 hours of programming for my computer graphics assignment (since I'm new to OpenGL & C, usually it would hit 8 hours, rather than just a bare minimum of 4 hours)

2) I'm taking another computing module entitled Digital Media Production, where we become directors and producers, learning how to make good films. I spend 4-6 hours weekly for project meetings, write the reports and do the actual filming. If video editing is necessary, add in another 2 hours.

3) 2-3 hours of doing statistics tutorial (and I must do it, cos' participation counts to my grade grrr)

4) 2 hours spent on 2 weekly readings from NM3224 Culture Industries

5) 1-2 hours spent to prepare NM3224 tutorial (this is worse... 20% participation grade =.=)

6) 2-4 hours reading up and drafting my NM3224 individual essay

7) 2 hours to read through 3-4 chapters of a library book and take down notes, which is the basis of a book review assignment in NM4218 Knowledge Management

8) 2 hours for NM4218 group project

Bear in mind that these are all raw hours. I don't claim to study 10 hours, and watch a few TV shows in between, or take a long elaborate dinner break.

Taking the maximum, it's about 29 hours per week. In comparison to the CHC standard for JC students which is 15 hours, it's almost twice as much if I intend to work extra harder. And also, this is just the bare minimum to get through my assignments. I've not even accounted for self-revision time! =S

So, why am I wasting time typing this post? I don't know. I just had a massive headache yesterday cos' I was too ambitious and wanted to rush through a few assignments, so I had better relax for awhile today before heading to school.

Even spending 2-3 hours preparing my sermon yesterday disrupted my study schedule so much, that I was doing tutorials way past 12 midnight. Wow, must I really be a hermit this semester? I'm so ill-prepared for the preaching later... I pray that God will make things right as I dedicate my time to Him.

Alright, cya guys for yet another exciting episode of CGM! =)

School is tiring...

2009-08-31T00:04:00.007+08:00

It's only Week 3 of school and I'm already feeling so worn out... I had to cope with a steep learning curve, being forced to convert my Java programming knowledge to C (usually, people would go through C++ first cos' it's much more similar to Java), with OpenGL (a graphics programming language) tacked on it to add on to my woes. And let's not forget the onslaught of the 20+ pages New Media readings which I have to faithfully read through each and every week to prepare myself adequately for tutorials. =S

My migraines seem to be getting worse, and my entire body feels so tense, despite all efforts to relax. Sometimes, I feel that life is so unfair. I've been eating nothing but yongtaufoo, sliced fish bee hoon and other healthy stuff day after day. Sleeping punctually at 12-1 AM, with at least 7-8 hours of sleep daily. Others are indulging in sinful food pleasures without thinking twice, and staying up till 4 AM staring at the computer screen. And yet, I'm the one stricken with these ailments and not them. Not that I wanna curse anyone but it's just very disheartening for me. =(

And so, with these burdens weighing heavily on me, I reluctantly agreed KC bro to meet him up earlier to practise our song item. We did not have a proper practice and I actually had school till 6 on Friday, meaning I couldn't even meet him earlier. But I didn't want to disappoint him so I went for an earlier tutorial, and freed up time nearing CGM timing to come up with something with him.

I always look so constipated when I sing *lol*

I'm glad I performed after all cos' singing truly re-energizes me. =) And as I gave my time to God, served him in the ways of my talents, He rewarded me by giving me the spirit of wisdom to FINALLY finish my assignment on Saturday after service. Praise the Lord! =D

I'm also very blessed to be a part of the E441 family. Several CG mates came up to me, offering words of encouragement. One remarked how she seldom hear my voice, and that I should sing more often. Another said she missed hearing my voice (2 long years after Emerge Talentime). A few others complimented my singing. I know that I can carry on walking with you guys by my side! =)

Congrats to Wen Long and An Xian on your water baptism! It's a new beginning for you guys, and I'll pray that you'll soar to greater heights with God. =)

Some long overdue photos from my brother's wedding...

Jamie always look so glam... I feel abit stressed taking photos with her HAHA! =P

Thank you guys for making your way down to my brother's wedding =)

Alright, I'll catch you guys sometime soon. Thanks for reading! (^_^)

God made us all unique

2009-08-24T00:00:00.005+08:00

Woots, Adobe Premiere is fun! =) I just spent the day doing up my first assignment, which is to make a short 60s introduction video of myself. I reckon it's a useful casual skill to have when we have to do up videos for CG or zone events. I'll show you my guys my handy work if there's a chance. (^_^)

On the other hand, OpenGL & C programming language are killing me badly. Why the heck did the SoC profs force us to learn Java as our foundation programming skill, when graphics are largely coded in C/C++?! Grrr... The learning curve is seriously too steep... =( I have to hand up my assignment by Sunday in the midst of a heavy school week and preparations for Friday's performance. God bless me. =S

Talking about Friday's performance, after yesterday's service ended, KC bro and I rushed to City Hall to meet Matthew, our new beatboxing friend. Our agenda was to have him collaborate with me for a short song segment to augment my 60s video production. It went great! =) And while we were chilling, we had some time to decide the songs for Friday's performance, and practised a little. I hope he'll get integrated into the church soon. =D

I'm just wondering... in the quest to stay uniquely me, I may have become more difficult to get along with. A common flaw which I've noticed in most of my 'non-conformist' friends is that they subsconsciously impose their ideas on the people around them.

I'm trying my best not to be like that since we're living in a free world after all. Everyone has their own rights to pursue their own paths. But I just can't help but feel frustrated and awkward when someone does something which is in direct conflict of my philosophy.

Nowadays, I make it a point to make my every action count for something towards building my personality and character. I don't want to do something cookie-cutter, and put myself up for comparison with the vast hordes of people who are doing the same thing.

2 years back, Annabelle violently rejected my bid to perform 'When You Say Nothing At All' by Ronan Keating for Emerge Talentime. "You sound too much like Ronan Keating! I want to hear your true voice. I won't let you sing that song". At that point in time, I was wondering "what's the big deal?". But now, I finally understand what she was driving at.

Personality. Character. 2 important traits which are far more important than looks or charisma. These traits have the lasting power and effect on the people around us. Remember the point I made about typical Singaporeans? Do I go with the trends and pick up new hobbies? Or do I focus on the one talent which God has put in me, which is singing?

It's easy to get caught up in the ebb of tide which flows fickledly in the Singaporean youth culture. We, as Christians however, have to be sure of who we are in God, and not try to be someone else! Do I learn hip-hop dancing to go with the trend or to please a few friends around me? Absolutely not! I'll have a basic head knowledge of their hobbies to sustain conversations, but I definitely will not deviate from my one true talent. If they can't accept that, they're not my true friends at all!

I'll be sure to bump heads with more people along the way with my unique approach to life itself. I'm praying God will give me the wisdom to handle such situations in a rational manner. Heh, so much for my philosophical rants. Time to rest up early for another long day of programming graphics, and reading NM articles which span at least 20 pages each. (=.=)

The first wedding in my family

2009-08-17T17:13:00.000+08:00

What an eventful night of wedding celebrations! I'm glad that my brother finally found his lifelong partner in life, and their journey has just begun yesterday. =) I used to resent his presence alot but it does feel a tad bit weird without him bossing me around, playing loud music which disrupts my studying.

We were an awkward sibling duo cos' of our huge age gap of 6 years, but nevertheless, we're related by blood and that'll never change. I sincerely wish my brother, Melvin, and my sister-in-law, Priscilla, a blissful marriage for eternity, and that God will always remain the centre of their covenant in marriage.

I had a good fellowship with my church friends at the wedding too, especially an occasion where Bro Darren, Sofyan, Francis and I engaged in conversation. I never thought that I could carry a conversation well with the leaders in church (except Francis of cos' =P) cos' I'd be sooo stressed! But it went well and I'm thankful! =)

We were discussing about Japanese culture, why Sofyan and I are so into the Japanese language, commenting on the local cosplay scene, making jokes about the SG wannabes who unwittingly make a fool out of themselves as cosplayers. When Bro Darren asked me why I like Japan so much, and I replied that I want a Japanese wife, he was taken aback for a moment, and I quickly affirmed that I like the culture foremost above all else. Whew, close shave haha! =P

He also updated us on the humanitarian work around Asia and a probable mission trip to Indonesia this December. He encouraged me to go, and now there's no escape *lol*! No la, I'll do my best to align my vision with his, so that I would be enthusiastic about it when the time comes.

I'll update the blog with some photos from the wedding once it's uploaded. (^_^)

And some of the photos from the SOT graduation this past Saturday to spice up my blog a little...

Zoe, my dear CGL, congrats on your SOT graduation! =)

E441! I'm beginning to appreciate you guys more and more =)

After a extravagant weekend of celebrations, it's back to the mundane boring ol' studying for me. Haha. =S I just need to focus on the SEP to Japan that's awaiting me next year to spur me on...

2009-08-16T13:26:00.000+08:00

Whew... I'm sooo exhausted... Playing host to your guests is a really tough job. I was taking care of my grandfather who was handicapped, cleaning up the mess that my baby cousins made, and fellowshipping with my church friends almost simultaneously. (=.=)

And now, it's all over... PHEW! I can rest up for a good 3 hours before heading down to Fullerton for the wedding dinner. =)

I was having a casual chat with Brother Qizhi and Justin, and they asked me when will my wedding day come. Oh gosh, I think I've reached that certain age of maturity that people would start asking me about these sort of questions. =S

They were poking fun at me, asking what type of girl I like. I think Brother Qizhi said "somebody wild", and Brother Justin chipped in "S&M whip kinda", and they both ended off in unison with the sound of a whiplash *WHIP*! Oh my, super funny la... (=.=)

The conversation toned down a little, and they commented how most of the girls in my cell group are already attached. Valerie... Jamie... Janet... Wait... Janet!? So, I corrected them, saying that Janet is single, and Brother Justin immediately responded by saying "but she's not the type for you la". Yeah, for once, I agree LOL! =D

Oh gosh... So stressed... A 22 year old guy who has not even been on a date before... But I'm really hoping to stand by my conviction that my first girlfriend will be my last, cos' she'll be my wife. I can't let this impending stress dampen my standards. =P

2009 has been sadly a year of breakups, and that's why I'm approaching this topic very VERY cautiously.

Alrighty, I'll catch some eyeshut for a little moment. Update you guys again on the happenings during the wedding dinner later! =)

My day in church and a rant

2009-08-16T00:41:00.002+08:00

Wooo, had a great time in church! Not particularly about the service itself since it was SOT graduation and Pastor Kong didn't share a deep word with us, but cos' I made 2 sociable and amiable new friends who are musically inclined.

Seeing how passionate they are about their musical talents, it also stirred the dormant singing talent in me. Let's hope they'll get integrated into E441 and we'll get something going with our combined talents! =)

My day was almost ruined by one conspicuous member from our CG. With us, he's totally nonchalant and acts like a lethargic zombie. With his own friends, he brightens up and act as if he's some kinda social maestro.

The worse thing is that he's inviting them just for the sake of it. I don't sense any spiritual genuity from him, much less spiritual discernment over his friends' lives. He's totally bochup, doesn't inform his spiritual leader that his friends are coming, expects us to book seats for them when they're late.

No, that's not the worst thing. The WORST thing is that the friends are also bochup. They stroll in ONE AND A HALF HOURS late, drop their lazy bums on the chairs, and one of them actually has the cheek to casually sip Coca-Cola from a Mcdonalds' cup. They didn't clap for the SOT graduates, but engaged in their little gossip banter.

AND...! After sitting for less than 30 minutes, they picked up their asses and openly STROLLED out of the service, whilst the ceremony was still ongoing. Utter disrespect for the SOT graduates, for the church, and for God Himself. I was superbly infuriated and had the mind to ask them to GTFO if they aren't serious about church. >:(

And as for that church member I'm talking about? Seriously, I shan't be bothered about him either. As long as he doesn't get on my nerves again, we're fine, and I doubt I can communicate on the same frequency as him. Just don't do something as stupid as that again, or I can't control the expletives anymore.

Okay... I'm done with my rants! I'd need to sleep RIGHT NOW cos' I'll be waking up early tomorrow to prepare for my brother's wedding. Oh gosh, it's gonna be a long day. (=.=) Some random Youtube videos to end my post. (^_^)

My favourite new 'superhero', Mr Methane! ROFL! =D

An imperfect singer, but you can feel his genuity and honesty flowing through his performance. Just great... I'll be pursuing this sort of musical direction =)

Eventful first day of school =)

2009-08-11T23:33:00.000+08:00

Eventful in a good way! After being a social hermit for a good period of 3 months, only meeting my CG weekly and occasionally, my Singtel and laojiao cliques, I got to see other familiar faces in NUS and already in the process of making new friends on just the 1st day of school. =)

First up, I went for a New Media lecture with Michelle this morning. For once, I feel glad to be in Singapore cos' there are so many pretty girls in the lecture... Ops =X BUT! The main point was that I caught up with Michelle, my dear Singtel ex-colleague, ongoing NUS friend. And through her, I got acquainted with her other friend. Well, she's not exactly pretty... But definitely a witty and interesting person. =)

Next up was my 2 hours break. I bumped into Yong, my dear OG mate, who was heading for lecture. Had a short but great catch-up session. Before I left to 'emo' on my own, I caught Victor who was just dismissed from his lecture. Oh man, it was super weird seeing him in school and even discussing academic stuff, but I'm glad he was there to accompany me. =)

Yong... The 2nd big guy from the right. Big guy with a big heart (^_^)

Was supposed to have lunch with him and his OG friend, but I was pleasantly surprised that my JSS-senpai rang me up and took the initiative to meet me up! After 2 years of being a 'phantom member' of the club, I could finally meet him up in person. Funny friendship we have, eh? 2 years as friends solely on MSN, and finally seeing each other's face today. Bumped into many JSS faces along the way too, such as my last semester's project mate whom I consider one of my best 'random' project mates ever lol. =P

My statistics lecture came next, and I'm pleasantly surprised that Litus is taking the module too. I ranted about him a little from last semester's traumatizing project (if you guys can remember my rants lol), but he's a fine dude to hang out with when he's free from project stress. Kristal is around as usual. =) I'm really glad for her existence in my life, otherwise I know not how to survive in NUS thus far.

Michelle, the cute girl at the far right, and Kristal, the funky girl just beside her =D

I'm still awaiting the results to my appeal for an NM module. Grrr... >:( I went for class alone anyways and the first face who greeted me when I entered the classroom was a friend whom I knew through Emerge Talentime '07. OMG! How coincidental is that? But the amazing thing is that he's also a choir member, so if we decide to go for choir practice after class, I have companionship. At the moment in time, there was a sudden realization that God is looking after me in His own ways, and I've experienced it firsthand this time round. =)

This was the time when we battled together as singers... (Haha cheap excuse to post this photo again =P)

Regarding E441, I'm glad that besides Victor, I'm getting to know the other 2 'V's, Valerie and Vanessa, better. I'm trying my best to make up for lost time cos' I felt that I had neglected our friendships in the old E348. At least I'm not so dependent on KC for companionship nowadays. Haha! (^_^)

To the 3 'V's, thank you very much for taking the initiative to rekindle our friendships =)

And... On my 1st day back to school, I bumped into that Japanese-looking girl from Lakeside whom I kinda fancied last semester YET AGAIN! Oh gosh, God is telling me something. Or is it the devil at work, trying to divert my attention away from my studies? Haha... =P

And it begins again...

2009-08-10T12:03:00.001+08:00

2 days ago, I was pleasantly surprised that one of my good friends offered words of encouragement to me, assuring me that I have what it takes to succeed in life. This was in response to my MSN display message, written in Japanese, meaning "I want to believe in myself".

He said that I was caring, much more gentlemanly than he is. That got me thinking, am I overly caring, perhaps? Somehow, I never cease to get the feeling that good friends around me are taking my friendship for granted, and inevitably fall into depression and frustration when I try investing my effort in someone's life and he/she doesn't reciprocate.

Whatever it is, I hope that I would set things right this semester before I head off to Japan next year. Past wounds from last semester linger on. The drudgery of university education persists. But I'm gonna harden my resolve this time round.

First up, I'll forget all the so-called friends who are shallow and flaky. Shit those guys, they're not worth my time. Secondly, while every horny guy in NUS is busy going on their 'hunt' for pretty female freshies, I'll toughen my discipline and study doubly hard, praying that my efforts will pay off in a few more 'A's.

And it all starts again tomorrow. I'm not gonna ever be emo again. Please pray for me guys. =)

NUS is an administrative wreck... =.=

2009-08-06T23:56:00.003+08:00

Zzz... I've been busy lately emailing NUS admin regarding module bidding problems, and all they gave were halfhearted replies. I wanted to take this certain module because it seemed interesting, so I wrote an elaborate email giving my reasons and appealed to a professor to consider allowing me to take the module as my major elective. And his reply was...

Prof: The module is not so related to your major. You can take it as an unrestricted elective.

Errr... Yeah thanks, prof... Can't you be a tad bit more helpful and give me simple reasons why, so that I might understand and be appeased? And go out of your way to help out by suggesting alternative modules which is similar? Pfft... (=.=)

Well... That's not the end of the story. Before this, I emailed to the department, seeking their help to aid me in forwarding my appeal request to the relevant authorities. What follows next amazed me.

Admin: Please email the professor at this email .

Uhhh... How hard is it to simply click the mouse a few times to forward the email to him? In the end, I had to copy & paste my message, write an add-on message to the professor telling him that this is a prior email sent to the department.

And I had to wait 3 days for that shitty reply. Singaporeans are amazing, I tell you.

On Wednesday, I was just watching this TV variety show featuring Mark Lee as the host, assessing how gracious our society is compared to other nations. For once, I was rooting for Mark Lee, as he blatantly pointed out how ungracious Singaporeans are.

The program shifted to Taiwan, and it is so obvious and evident that our society pales in comparison to Taiwan's. Every Singaporean interviewee also mentioned that Japan is the nation to look upon regarding manners and culture.

Yeah... Our economy might be a miracle for a small nation such as ours. Changi Airport is the No. 1 airport in the world. But I'd say... Big deal... If we don't advance our society on a whole, all these successes would come crumbling down very soon.

It doesn't help matters that the government is encouraging the influx of foreign workers and talents who are solely concerned about their own well-being and don't bother assimilating well into our society. Who is a Singaporean, really? PRs are getting larger in numbers by the day...

Oh well, I better not rattle on any further. Political issues are touchy and I usually don't bother unless it's really getting on my nerves.

Holidays are drawing to an end. It's back to school for me. Sigh... =(

Can we see our futures?

2009-08-04T00:00:00.008+08:00

Back for one day only... As a traditional choir boy performing for the masses... The feeling of nostalgia swept past me as I saw the crowds before my eyes. Despite a nagging migraine episode and terrible insomnia on the prior night, I felt that it was a milestone for me on my life's journey with God. Thanks for the encouraging words, E441 brothers and sisters. No matter how hard it might be, I will continue shining for God through my talents. (^_^)

Janet's new blog post has got me thinking. What do I envision myself doing in the future? Well, it seems that I've mapped out an ideal road for myself. Study hard, get my honours degree, also raising my Japanese proficiency to JLPT1 at the same time. Work in a Japanese-affiliated company, and work diligently in order to get posted to Japan, hopefully for good.

I'm not just dreaming things, but there are realistic options available to me. Koei Singapore (U know? The game company that made Dynasty Warriors) is offering internship opportunities to Japan for a good few years. But I'm not too sure if it is truly God's will. We'll see. =)

In an alternate reality, where we have all the talents in the world, what would we want to be? I feel that people are discounting their true significance in life and settle for a mundane 9-5 job for worldly security. If u had all the abilities in the world and fervently pursue ur dreams, what would it be? For me...

#1: Pop idol/Dancer-singer

In my opinion, these guys (and a gal) are considered leaders in this industry. They're not just good-looking but their talents are real and it's not just a marketing ploy, unlike cringe-worthy boybands such as Fahrenheit. They're cool, confident and charismatic. The 3Cs which are severely lacking in me. =S

If only I could dance like they do... I've got 2 left feet... I can't even dance the simple Jaiho dance which Elson & gang had us do during soundOUT. LOL! 4 out of 5 members of Tohoshinki and BoA are of the same age of me. They're millionaires, having a vast fanbase, earning a living through what they enjoy doing the most, whereas here I am, a miserable average Singaporean struggling through university. Life is indeed unfair. (=.=")

#2: Street magician

Yet another person who is perfect in what he does. The embodiment of coolness, charisma and confidence. I like Cyril Takayama over other prominent magicians such as David Blaine or Criss Angel, because he has that extra human touch to actually connect with his audience on a comfortable and heartwarming level.

His magic doesn't make u cringe or worry for his well-being, but instead it puts a smile to ur face. He goes to the streets to entertain the common people. He doesn't need a grand stage to show off his talent to the entire world. I really respect this dude.

I'm so bad at keeping a straight face. If I ever tried doing a magic trick, everyone would know the trick just from observing my facial expressions. So, magic is out of the equation for me haha!

#3: WWE superstar (LOL!)

If u smellalalalala what the Rock is cooking!? Okay, I'm starting to sound like a hyper teenage kid lol, but seriously, I admire them for dedicating their bodies to hone their craft. But wrestling good alone doesn't win them fans. They gotta know how to connect with the crowd through the mic. That takes... U guessed it... Charisma. Being cool. Confidence. The Rock is one good role model in this aspect. Too bad he was lured away by Hollywood...

Well, if I were a little healthier, I might consider learning karate or wrestling as a CCA when I head to Japan for SEP next year. I think I wouldn't fare badly in a real fight, but having actual skills to back me up would make me much tougher. I kinda forgot almost all the techniques I learnt in ACCT during NS, spare a few simple and efficient ones. Praying that I'll triumph over the demons of sickness soon...

Having said all these, I shan't belittle the talent which God has placed in me. Even if I have to stay as an insignificant member of choir for a lifetime. As long as I know that my talents are blessing the people around me.

I'm praying that Bro Darren has a God-given vision regarding the recent focus on talents. I wish that he could be a little more liberal though... The youth zone remains entrenched in stagnancy because of the over-reliance on established members such as the CGLs, and the usual band comprising of John, Ryan etc.

Whatever it is, I'm trusting in God and my leaders! So, do u think u can u see ur future ahead of u? =)

2009-07-30T23:31:00.005+08:00

Went for my final appointment with my ENT doctor this past morning. This is my first time in over 1 year that I'm breathing comfortably through BOTH my nostrils. Nasal blockage really sucks. =S

Just as I was exiting Paragon, 2 Japanese obasans in their mid to late 30s came up to me and asked for my help to take a photo of them. I don't know what went through my mind, but I plucked up my courage to speak to them! =) ... And I think I did quite a good job, despite the minor stuttering and the occasional wrong terms used! =D

Friends think that I'm learning Japanese to hook up pretty young Japanese girls, but they're so wrong. They might be unattractive obasans, but the short 5 minutes conversation I had with them truly brighten up my day. I feel an affinity to all Japanese. Short, tall, ugly, pretty. As long as I feel that they're nice people. =P I'm gonna try strike a conversation with a Japanese SOT ojisan before the choir performance. (^_^)

Just had a chat with my JSS friend on MSN, and came to know that he's heading to Tokyo Institute of Technology (TITECH) for his SEP. I realized that TITECH does offer some computing courses, and for a moment in time, I panicked, knowing that I'm heading to Kyushu University to clear all my breadth modules, meaning that I'm gonna suffer taking alot of core modules when I return.

At that point in time, I could feel God comforting me, and assuring me that I've made the right choice. God seems to be setting me up for something big as I tread on my life's journey. I could have went to better secondary schools such as RV or Chinese High, but I chose CSS. JJC is just beside my home, but I chose SAJC (and I hated the angmo-wannabe environment, but luckily I had laojiao gang to tide me through my time in JC). NTU Computing is much more renowned, but I'm stuck here in NUS (and I feel sooo miserable as of yet...)

And right now... Why am I going to Fukuoka instead of Tokyo, where I'm familiar and comfortable in? Is it a coincidence that the biggest revival in Japan is happening in Fukuoka Harvest Church? Am I meant to be a piece of the puzzle? I do not know, but as I pray that God would sustain me as I tread on this seemingly difficult path, and I would come to understand the purpose He has for me in this life.

Cya guys who will be sending Debbie off tomorrow! :)

Ack... Blogger is going gaga again...

2009-07-30T00:01:00.008+08:00

Geez... Finally, Blogger is back to normal... For some weird unexplained reason, the edit toolbar wasn't available for the past few days, so I couldn't upload photos.

Over this past week, we were kept busy fellowshipping with Debbie for the last few times cos' she'll be heading to Australia for studies soon. How time flies, we'll miss her loads. =(

Now u see Wendy...

Now u don't! (Okay, I know that was lame... =.=)

Great fellowship! =)

First time in Eski Bar...

We'll miss u, Debbie! Bon voyage! (^_^)

Seems like everyone is travelling overseas to further their aspirations... We'll be sending Debbie off this Friday. Another friend is travelling to Shanghai for student exchange program too. And I'll be away to Japan as well for one semester early next year.

There's a saying that goes 'the grass is always greener on the other side'. But I say that the grass is indeed withering in Singapore. I'd encourage friends who have the capacity to travel overseas, be it for career or studies, to go without thinking twice. Life feels so stifled and dull as a plain ol' Singaporean. (Zzz...)

And finally after spending more than 1/5 of a thousand dollars (imitating Janet =D) on online sprees, my FIRST item arrived on Tuesday... Oh gosh, I hate the long wait... =.=

Pls don't laugh at my Pikachu pillow in the background (>.<)

My mum chided me a little for buying new clothes on my own. I can't imagine her reaction when my other spree items arrive in batches of 3 each. Eeksss! =S

One more week to school... But before that, I have a choir performance for CHC anniversary to worry about. See all u guys who will be sending Debbie off on Friday! =)

Val's 21st B'day Party!~

2009-07-19T20:58:00.010+08:00

This past Friday was Val's 21st birthday party! We sure had loads of fun that day! =) It also marked the first time that I'm giving a birthday present to a girl, and Janet, Jamie and Debbie were suan-ing me why I didn't do the same for them on their birthdays. (>.<)

Sorry, it's not that I don't care about u gals! But the circumstances then and now were vastly different, and I was experiencing tremendous stress in school then, that I couldn't even think about enjoying myself, much less cultivate the motivation to shop for birthday presents. Hope u gals understand, and I'll promise to try make it up to u! ...Somehow...Someday... =S

The gals got us to imitate the BOF poses... (o.O) And Janet, why am I Woo Bin!? He's a calefare in the show... =( Can I be Yi Jung instead? =)

KC bro and I relaxing for awhile...

A play on the numbers 1, 2 and 3... And Ding Neng came up with this funny idea... (>.<) Finally gave the present to Val, and had a quick pose with the b'day gal ! Glad u liked the present, Val! =D

12 or 21? Hmmm... =S

E441!!!

2 more weeks before school reopens... Sigh... =(

2009-07-16T22:01:00.003+08:00

Argh... I just can't seem to discipline myself to save nowadays... I've been seeing a new ENT doctor recently to help me get rid of my nasal blockage, and I had my follow-up appointment just now. And since everything ended around noontime, I had the luxury of time to do some shopping...

#1: Bought a Japanese hairstyle magazine from Takashimaya's Kinokuniya

#2: Bought Val's birthday gift at Kalm's... Dang, Kalm's stuff is friggin' expensive! (=.=)

#3: Ate Tori Katsu at Yoshinoya... Why, oh why, Food Republic is always so packed =(

#4: Stopped by JE to get some cough medicine from my GP (which I suspect the culprit was Victor's 'friendly' cough virus =P), and conveniently, Popular was around the corner, and I bought Tank's latest album

Hmmm... Everything set me back about $80+... Bahhh... (=.=) Alright, I gotta stop spending and start saving for my Japan study trip next year...

Just as I got back home and set my stuff down, and preparing to relax, my senpai (Japanese honorific term for senior), who is currently in Tokyo on a study exchange program, began ranting to me how 'uncute' Singaporean girls are. Pampered, snotty, indifferent, are just some of the 'milder' terms which he lambasted Singaporean girls with. And I shan't elaborate further to avoid backlash from my female readers. HAHA! =S

How about Singaporean guys? My loyal blog readers would know that I have an issue with the typical Singaporean guy. So let's run down my checklist and determine if u're a typical Singaporean guy. =D

#1: Around ur sec sch era, u tried too hard to act like an ah beng (or like I call it, xiao hun hun a.k.a little kid who likes to mess around) to earn the right to hang out with the 'cool' dudes in school, even though u might be a geeky bookworm. 8-D

#2: A little in the JC/Poly period, u got interested in soccer and can name every single player in the English Premier League squads. But not cos' u really like soccer, but just cos' u don't wanna look like the 'odd kid in the block' and be ostracized. Heck, u've got 2 left feet and u can't even dribble the ball properly even if ur life depended on it. (o.O)

#3: NS makes u utterly deprived of girls, and u hit the clubs and pubs more often than before, just for the purpose of hooking up girls. U might not like booze, dance like a robot chicken, and stutter like a monkey getting electrocuted whenever u try to hit it off with a babe, but something indescribable within u compels u to hit the clubs oh so frequently. (=.=)

#4: If u're in tertiary education, this would apply to u. U join orientation camp after orientation camp, hoping to meet the girl of ur dreams, or at least widen ur social circle, but at the end of the day, u go home feeling empty despite making 1001 new friends. (C'mon la, wake up, wake up! Invest ur time and effort in friends who really matter =D)

#5: U start rambling about the latest sports car as if u're Michael Schumacher himself, when in reality, u can't even afford the tyre of a Toyota car. =S

#6: U like a certain genre of music, but are afraid to be different from the rest, so ur iPod playlist is disguised with all the typical songs which Singaporeans listen to, so that u'll look trendy to ur peers, instead of them laughing at ur weird taste for music. (I'm so sick of hearing Lady Gaga's song all over the island. =.= Or the overplayed Jason Mraz's I'm Yours, which is seriously overkill for me, altho' I like Jason Mraz's songs)

#7: U start becoming a gym freak, and become obsessed with tanning, so that u'll develop the perfect sculpted body which women would love.

#8: Ur hobbies are defined by the trends. If guitar is cool, u'll learn it (and break some strings). If windsurfing is cool, u'll hit the beach (and fall into the sea umpteen times). If hip-hop dancing is cool, u'll try too hard to impress girls (and fall flat on ur butt).

#9: If u like Japan, it's because of the anime, food and girls (quote from my senpai). And... the disillusioned u think u like Japan, but Japan is much more than just that, and u can never understand that.

#10: SOP (Standard Operational Procedure) Attire: Crumpler (why!!!), bermudas (with Pedro shoes), uninteresting t-shirts. Following fashion trends blindly. (3 blind mice... 3 blind mice...)

#11: All u do all day is emo about BGR problems (Zzz...)

Haha, if u are guilty of at least 5 of these points, I'd consider u the typical Singaporean guy. No offence tho'. =) Being typical keeps u safe and protected in a rigid Singaporean society which expects every citizen to conform. Because of my 'rebellious' nature, I doubt I can stay in SG for long after I graduate. Sooo hoping that there'll be career opportunities for me in Japan...

Anyways, tomorrow's Val's birthday party! =D I nearly forgot about it, but thankfully An Xian reminded me (ops =X). First time actually spending time to buy present for a girl too. Good practice for me when I go to Japan and look for a girlfriend. =P I'm so sorry, Debbie, Janet and Jamie! I'd have done the same too, if I wasn't too caught up with my schoolwork back then. Please forgive me. (>.<) Alrighty, cya guys tomorrow for the PAR-TAY! =D

Tiring but fulfilling Saturday :-)

2009-07-13T00:39:00.003+08:00

Whew... It was really exhausting on Saturday! But I'm glad to have stepped out to perform so many tasks for God in just one day. =) Leading praise was abit haywire cos' Kenneth and I didn't rehearse adequately before CGM started, but all in all, it was a great experience!

First time serving choir in Expo too... Had been quite sometime since I last stood on the stage (since Emerge '07)... It was comforting to have Victor and Royston around me, rather than awkwardly attempting to interact with overzealous strangers in the JW service. (T.T)

And lastly, I'm glad I could help out in soundOUT! Although I didn't take centerstage as a singer, Bro Darren's message of unspectacular talents reminded me to stay faithful in the little things I was doing. As long as God sees, I'll be contented! =D

Well, onto some rants... It's kinda irksome to observe some individuals taking church for granted. They're the last ones to arrive for service/CGM, probably first ones to leave, don't bother to lift a finger to help out, stick to their own cliques and ignore the rest.

Are they divas, VIPs or what!? Seems like they're attending church just for the fun factor and convenient social networking. If that's their intentions, just log on to Facebook la. There's so many fun apps and games. Why bother coming to church?

I know I should serve with a pure heart without prejudice, but I just subconsciously get this feeling when my comrades and I were busy helping out in soundOUT and some people were outside the room, relaxing and chilling out. They're not exactly young Christians as well, so I believe they should know the meaning of servanthood. It's a slap to the face to those of us who treat coming to church seriously, which involves commitment, dedication and devotion to our one God.

If they have absolutely nothing to help out with, at least go around show some concern for those who are slogging hard la! Is showing appreciation to everyone who made all the events successful that hard!? Pfft... (Some of u might get a hint of whom I'm talking about... Might not sit well with u guys, but u guys know my style... I'm a straightforward kinda person... That, I can't change, but at least I won't mention names...)

Just some updates on my online spree shopping!

Online sprees are great. Not only can u get unique fashion which is not readily available in Singapore, it's also rather affordable even after including shipping fees. But now I understand the other side of the coin. 2 sprees I was participating in were cancelled cos' the suppliers are sleeping and failed to contact the spree owner. =(

So, I had to 'transfer' my funds to another spree. But it's all good, cos' I realized I was intending to buy too many t-shirts of similar style. =P Given this 2nd chance to re-pick my stuff, I made sure I sift out something that is unique.

It's only one-piece! Under SG's hot weather, u can't normally wear a singlet, a shirt AND a jacket. U'll just melt to death. =.= But as a one-piece, it gives a neat 'illusion' while maintaining the style. I just hope it fits! =P

Same for this! I hope I can pull off the cardigan style well...

Arghhh... My stuff's taking such a long time to arrive... Hope everything comes before the new semester starts... (>.<)

Tiring but fulfilling Saturday :-)

2009-07-13T00:13:00.003+08:00

Resolutions...

2009-07-11T01:00:00.005+08:00

Life has been pretty empty for me these past 2 months. Sighhh... (=.=) Should have seized the opportunity to do something meaningful. But what's done is done. In the past, whiling away my time playing computer games seemed like the ideal holiday for me (besides travelling overseas of cos' =P). But now, I just feel so empty... I know I'm destined for greater things than just living the mundane life...

I'm still plagued by the demons of illness, having the same doubts about myself. None of the deep problems that exist within me are resolved yet, and it'll probably won't be for a long time. But still, I have to toughen up my resolve and stay strong, in these times when my friends are facing problems, and I must be ready to be their pillar of support.

I'm trying my best to fill in the gaps which they've left behind until the time comes when they feel they're ready to let go of the past and reclaim their positions. I'll be leading praise in CGM for the 2nd time tomorrow, as well as serving in Expo for the 1st time, and offered to avail myself for any tasks regarding tomorrow's evangelistic event. On Zoe's request, I've did up some PPT slides. Hope the event goes well. =)

Somehow, I've lost confidence in my singing capabilities. I'm feeling short-breathed recently (possibly cos' I laze too much at home without exercise =S), so I can't sustain my singing voice consistently. I also feel it hard enunciating words nowadays. Is it cos' of my crooked teeth? Or has it something to do with the neurological complications caused by my migraines? I dunno... I don't even wanna think about it. I'll just live life everyday bravely, knowing that I'm well and alive, and that God loves me.

Besides, performing on stage now has no meaning to me. But if I can take to the stage together with Kelvin & Royston, I feel that I can muster the courage to perform once again, because sharing the stage with my close buddies would be my new motivation. Too bad Roy had another item prepared, and I think Kelvin couldn't find the enthusiasm in the midst of going through the toughest time of his life. Usually he would jump at any opportunity to sing on stage. Haha. =) Oh well, there'll be another time...

I must really push myself from next week onwards! Get my lazy ass off the bed and hit the road to get my fitness back. My face is getting sooo fat that it's making me feel inferior. =S Also my uni modules will be confirmed by Weds, so I must really discipline myself to drag my butt to NUS and purchase the textbooks to do some work. If u're my CHC bro or sis, pls kindly pray for me to have the spirit of discipline! (>.<) Hope everything goes fine tomorrow! Cya guys! =)

Zzz...

2009-07-05T00:14:00.005+08:00

Today's food hunt event for the youths "Taste of Freedom" really made me totally shagged out... (=.=) There wasn't much eating involved. Just waiting and queuing. The organisers overlooked some possible hiccups such as crowds and timing, but I could see that they've made effort in making the event a reality, so to show my appreciation and respect, I stayed on until the end of the event, no matter how tired I was. =)

Thankfully, the fellowship was quite good. An Xian brought his 2 friends, Joel and Jason, who are down-to-earth friendly dudes. Wan Xin, a friend of Kenneth, was also friendly and chatty. I'm kinda amazed that my dear friend and junior, Wen Long, actually can tahan going for 4 uni camps!

Speaking about uni camps, my NUS friend, Hongyi, said something rather funny but true, during our Singtel clique gathering last Thursday. He used to be quite enthusiastic about camps, but for this semester break, he opted to undertake an internship opportunity instead. When I asked him why, this was his reply...

"Girls our age already having a career, whereas us guys are still acting like excited kiddos in uni camps."

LOL! (^_^)

That was brutally honest (and unintentionally funny), but luckily, I wasn't a siao-on for uni camps either so his comments made no effect on me. True, isn't it? Girls my age are already donning their business attire, building up their careers, and support their own living. Guys my age are still acting like excited little kiddos in uni camps, playing the BGR game like pubescent teens with raging hormones, and most crucial of all, still living off our parents.

I feel kinda guilty in that sense, cos' instead of working this semester break, I've been slacking my arse all day long. After 2 months of the laidback lifestyle, I'm gonna make a vow to make my last month of holiday count for something. Once my modules are confirmed through the MPE (Module Preference Exercise), I'll be heading down to NUS one day to buy textbooks and do prepatory work (so that I can have a headstart ahead of my peers!).

Besides that, I'll be reading up some books to help me control my IBS and migraine. Hoping to start up the long delayed exercise regime, which would help with my health conditions too. And perhaps pack up my wardrobe and plan my Japan study trip properly in advance, if I have the time. If I can't support my parents now, well, at least I should reduce the burden I'm placing on them.

Heh, I'm sorry if I bored u with this post, but concerned friends would know what I'm up to for the upcoming month! =) Hmmm... Not sure if I should take up the challenge to perform on stage once more, for next week's Touch of Heaven... I can't muster the confidence that used to be in me when I took to the stage for Emerge Talentime... =S

Back from Genting!

2009-06-30T00:13:00.013+08:00

Back from my short weekend getaway trip to Genting with my JC pals! The 6 hour bus ride definitely turned me off, since for that same amount of time spent, I could have flew to Japan instead. But hey, it's cheap, so I can't find any further reasonable excuse to complain!

When there was absolutely nothing to do in the wee hours of the morning (I reached my hotel at about 5 AM, and check-in timing was freakin' 2 PM =.=), all I could do was embarrassing things like this... (>.<) Don't laugh... >:(

Laoda and me

Zhonglie was surprisingly sane throughout the trip (cos' he was rather well-known for doing nonsensical stuff lol)

But what's more surprising, was that the usually poised Yongloong was the opposite of this phenomena... Rofl =P

This dude is Chaoxing and I'm not really close to him. Got acquainted to him since my JC days through my laojiao clique.

Supposedly 'ostracized' by my other 2 friends, but I find him an okay guy besides some personal quirks (which everyone would have anyways)

3 emo dudes on the escalator *Phototaking, courtesy of ZL*

KTV session dampened by 'mishaps' created by ZL (pressing some button that made the screen go blank, and had to change rooms cos' of that =.=)

Wouldn't even think of playing pool in SG =P

Had a kind Malay dude take the only group photo of us at the outdoor theme park's Dinosaurland =)

Taken at Marrybrown, the Malaysian version of KFC. Gawd, I hate that huge pimple near my chin (probably cos' I couldn't bathe for long hours)

Sorry... I don't have many scenic pics, or interesting pics... Cos' usually, guys don't bother about taking photos. Guys just love to have fun! =D If Janet was there, I bet the memory card would be darn loaded... =S

Just a verbal account of fun things I did over there!

#1: First time driving a go-kart, and boy, was it fun! As u guys know, I lack confidence in my driving skills. I was a little conservative in my first attempt, but in my 2nd attempt, I negotiated a tight curve at full speed. The thrill of getting swung around by the huge centrifugal force, but yet able to skillfully maneuver my vehicle around the bend was an awesome feeling! =D

#2: I hate rollercoasters cos' I have a moderate fear of heights, and I was worried my chronic tummyache and headache might screw things up worse. But somehow, I was peer pressured into taking the Corkscrew rollercoaster, and I thought I was gonna faint midway *LOL*! But luckily, the thrill lasted only a couple of seconds and the second half of the ride was rather mild. Whew... =S

#3: Having a cinema experience in Malaysia! Transformers 2, no less. =) Megan Fox... Woots! (Ops =X) There's a weird seating option, which is in the form of an Osim massage chair *ROFL*! We wanted that but it was way in front, so we gave it a pass. Wayyy disorganized and inferior compared to SG, but it was cheap and worth the experience!

#4: In the Ripley's Believe It Or Not Museum, there's a bridge tunnel which has a revolving psychedelic background. Once u're in the tunnel, u'll feel as if the bridge is toppling and u're falling along with it! It's kinda funny observing my friends staggering on the bridge although it's a perfectly normal stable straight bridge, but when I became a victim myself, I felt utterly stupid *LOL*!

There's plenty of other quirky stuff there, such as a haunted mansion and some weird video service, which puts u in a stationary chair and superimpose ur face onto a dancing body in the video. =S If u like living in a dreamy theme park kinda world, Genting is probably the best alternative if u can't afford staying in a Disneyland resort in Japan or America. =P

Overall, the trip was OK. My friends are soccer fanatics and usually teasing each other and/or emo-ing about their BGR problems in NTU, so I couldn't relate to them half of the time. Many of my guy friends are emo-ing about BGR issues right now. I just can't understand why *LOL*! =S I always believe in letting nature takes its course, and letting God guide my path. No point emo-ing about girls who are unattainable anyways! =)

Alrighty, that's the end of my report! I'm back in SG, so feel free to find me for anything! Hey CG peeps, does Genting sound like a great CG retreat? =P I'm kinda obsessed with travelling overseas. Can't wait till next March and I'll get away from SG for a good 4-5 months, where I'll be gone to JAPAN! =)

Tis' the shopping season~

2009-06-23T23:47:00.014+08:00

I didn't know shopping can be so tiring! On Sunday, I shopped almost non-stop from 2 PM to 8 PM for my suit which is to be worn for my brother's wedding dinner. Managed to psycho my mum into buying slick Pedro shoes, instead of some $20 cheapo Bata shoes *lol*.

My brother had a 50% voucher for G2000, so I got my whole suit from there, although not without kinks in the process. The branch at Marina Square didn't have the size of the jacket which I wanted, and had to run back to the JP branch to get it. Whew!

Speaking about shopping, man, I spent a bomb on online sprees recently. I'm afraid just thinking how my mum will react when all my stuff arrives. =S

I wanted the whole set, but alas, the Tokyo 7 shirt was out of stock, so I only got the long-sleeve t-shirt. I'll be trying to find a day when it isn't that hot so I can wear this with another t-shirt...

BUT WHEN WILL I EVER FEEL THAT WAY IN SG!? But anyhow, I think it'd come in handy when I go to Japan for my SEP during their spring season. =D

Isn't really nice, but I had to settle for an alternative since the Tokyo 7 shirt was out of stock, and I've made my payment and didn't want to go through the hassle of refunding, checking bank account etc...

Elaborate medieval designs: My usual style of t-shirts =)

And... The Tokyo 7 t-shirt reappeared in another spree... =.= I'll be buying maroon cos' I have too many black t-shirts already

This is definitely an experiment for me. Shirt with hoods. Looks good on the model. Hoping it looks good on me too. (>.<)

I wanted a casual street-style vest, so this fits the bill perfectly, altho' I would have preferred if the whole vest is in the checkered pattern. SG dudes usually prefer the slick clubber-style black vest, but I just can't pull off the 型男 look, so I'll give it a pass.

And so do most of the guys. They try to imitate Justin Timberlake but end up looking like restaurant waiters most of the time. =X Discover ur own unique dress sense, guys!

And finally... A necklace! I'm not a fan of accessories but this really caught my eye, and I couldn't resist buying it! (>.<)

Just a quick sneak peek into my new wardrobe this coming August! In the meantime, hope I can survive my mum's wrath when she discovers my new stuff. =S

Anyway, I'll be heading up to Genting this weekend! =) A last minute decision made by my JC friends. Kinda guilty that some of my churchmates are going on a mission trip, whereas I'll be enjoying myself. =S Cya guys soon after my trip! =D

2009-06-20T14:58:00.005+08:00

Just a quick blog update before I head to church service! =)

I could have served in the choir for the 3.30 PM JW service today, but I've lost almost all motivation and enthusiasm to commit any further... During Zoe Conference this past Thursday, he made us write "God made me ___. When I ___, I feel His pleasure".

Of cos' I put 'sing' within these 2 blanks, but somehow I don't feel the joy, nor do I feel his pleasure when I serve in the choir. After hearing Pastor Tan's sermon for Fri's BS tho', I've decided to give it another try, no matter how reluctant I might be...

Anyway, after BS yesterday, I went for supper at JP with Royston, Janet and a new acquaintance, Jacob, cos' Janet gave me a pitiful look and I couldn't bear to disappoint her *lol*! Kinda surprised that Jacob's 2 other friends joined us, so the atmosphere was a tad bit awkward at first but everything turned out fine in the end!

Janet was all flustered last night cos' her rubber band for her braces broke unexpectedly, and her food was the last to arrive (bearing in mind, as a girl, she would be slower than the guys in eating! =S). Or is it... Cos' there's a handsome guy right opposite her? =P

Jacob is the tanned guy in the foreground. The person in question is right behind him, whose name just slipped my mind. =S Janet commented that he looks like...

Kim Joon from Boys Before Flowers *haha*

Speaking about Boys Before Flowers, no Korean girl has made my heart fluttered since BoA when I was a 15 year old young un'... =D

Kim So Eun! Awww... So cute... =)

On the other end of the spectrum, a Japanese schoolgirl rock guitarist has caught my attention.

She's the one who sings first

I didn't know I have a thing for girls with a wild streak to them *lol*! Or maybe it's cos' I respect anyone who resists conformity. In a rigid Japanese society where girls are expected to study hard, work a few years, marry during their mid-20s, and stay as a housewife forever, girls aspiring to become musicians would surely be frowned upon.

I know... I'm hard to please... =S Now u guys know why I've not have had a girlfriend ever in my life? Heh. =) I just find it rather childish to engage in the BGR game just for 'experience' or fleeting infatuation. When I find a girlfriend, I must be sure we'll last for a lifetime. =)

Alright... Time to prepare for service! And oh yeah, please tag my blog if u're reading. I feel kinda demoralized cos' my tagboard is rather dead. =( Thanks and ciao!~

*~ Flames Of Destiny ~*

The faithfulness of God

The battle is far from over

Time to let go...

Reverse cultural shock

An end to another chapter of my life

Last month in Japan... :(

Can I overcome this trial?

All's well... :)

The sting of love...

Osaka holidays: Day 4

Osaka holidays: Day 3

The bliss of love~

Osaka holidays: Day 2~

Back in Kansai

Some thoughts spiralling in my mind thus far...

Another unique experience!

Welcome party just for us new students!

Welcome trip to Beppu!

Updates for the week!

Fukuoka Harvest Church!

An eye-opener...

Probably the last me-time I would have... :)

A healthy dose of me-time for today :)

I can't believe I'm truly already in Japan :D

My last hurrah before my SEP! :)

Music is my life

Family woes...

Reality vs Dreams

In a deep dilemma...

What are your 'real clothes'?

The irony of life...

It's a brand new year!~

A little late but... MERRY X'MAS! (^_^)

Crossroads...

I've never spoken Japanese this much until now =P

It is... FINISHED!

Exams are coming... REAL SOON!

The madness is over...

The end of semester... A new beginning for my life

Just a little while more to go...

Hmmm...

It's the final lap...

I'm 23 yrs old! =P

The passage of life and death

I'm not joking about my testimony in CG =P

Getting older yet again...

e-Learning sucks

This post is something that screams MEEE!~

Birthday celebrations over the week~

Kyushu University students visit NUS!

Seiransai!~

Kristal's birthday party!~

Can I rejoice in my situation?

It's time for uni rants yet again!

School is tiring...

God made us all unique

The first wedding in my family

My day in church and a rant

Eventful first day of school =)

And it begins again...

NUS is an administrative wreck... =.=

Can we see our futures?

Val's 21st B'day Party!~

Tiring but fulfilling Saturday :-)

Tiring but fulfilling Saturday :-)

Resolutions...

Zzz...

Back from Genting!

Tis' the shopping season~

~ Flames Of Destiny ~